Poorly Described Games
A babysitter's game of hide-and-seek gets way out of hand after his boss is murdered.
Dishonored
An angry deceased CEO's pre-recorded voice demands you make combustible lemons while you bounce around in blue and orange goo.
Portal
You play a guy who looks like a cluster of pixels from above, terrorizing Anywhere City while an announcer occasionally shouts that Elvis has left the building.
GTA
A posh British woman solves elaborate puzzles just to shoot endangered species in the face.
Tomb Raider
You can spend hundreds of hours mastering the complex counter-hold system, but everyone will just assume you bought it for the bouncy aesthetics.
Dead or Alive