Counselor Presence
Awareness of your own feelings, assumptions, and reactions while counseling describes this skill.
counselor awareness
Brief responses such as “mm-hmm” and “go on” are examples of this skill.
minimal encouragers
“Did you talk to your teacher?” Is what type of question.
closed ended
Naming the emotion communicated by a student demonstrates this skill.
reflection of feeling
A counselor’s genuine, authentic presence reflects this core condition.
congruence, genuiness
Being emotionally available and fully engaged with a student in the moment demonstrates this skill.
therapeutic presence
Listening to understand the student rather than preparing your next response demonstrates this skill.
active listening
Change “Are you upset about your grade?” into an open-ended question.
How are you feeling about your grade?
Which response demonstrates empathy: “Poor you!” or “You’re feeling alone after losing someone important”?
“You’re feeling alone after losing someone important.” It communicates understanding of the student’s experience.
A middle school student expects the counselor to criticize them as a parent does. What process may be occurring?
Transference
A counselor asks, “What would make our time together helpful for you?” How does this strengthen the counseling alliance?
It invites collaboration and centers the student’s goals.
A student becomes quiet after sharing something painful. What is one appropriate use of silence?
Remain present and allow time to process, using responsive nonverbal attending rather than immediately filling the pause.
A counselor asks several questions in a row without reflecting or responding to the student’s answers. What trap are they falling into?
interview trap
A student says, “I worked so hard, and they picked someone else.” Offer a tentative reflection of feeling.
“You sound disappointed after putting so much into this.”
CBT examines the relationship among these three areas.
Thouoghts, feelings, behaviors
A student’s experience reminds you of your own painful experience, and you feel an urge to give advice. What should you do?
Notice your reaction, refocus on the student, and explore their experience. Process your reaction through reflection or supervision
A student looks away while talking. How can you demonstrate nonverbal attending without requiring eye contact?
Use a comfortable orientation, relaxed posture, responsive facial expressions, and attentive pauses. Follow the student’s comfort and communication preferences.
A student says, “I study every night, but my grades aren’t improving.” Paraphrase without adding an emotion the student has not expressed.
“You’re putting in consistent study time and aren’t seeing the improvement you expected.”
A student calmly describes a painful loss. How would you respond without assuming that limited outward emotion means they are unaffected?
What has this loss been like for you?” Allow the student to describe their experience and preferred way of expressing it.
A high school student says, “I must get into my first-choice college. Rejection would be unbearable.” Give a rational alternative.
“I strongly want to get in, but I don’t have to. Rejection would be disappointing, and I could cope and consider other options.” Accept equivalent responses
A student says, “Adults at this school don’t understand families like mine.” Respond with cultural humility while building the relationship.
“You’ve felt misunderstood here. I want to understand what adults have missed about your family, if you’re comfortable sharing.”
A student says, “It’s whatever,” but their voice trembles and their hands tighten. Respond to both their words and nonverbal communication without assuming what they feel.
“You’re saying it’s whatever, and I noticed your voice changed just now. What’s happening for you?”
A student discusses a friend conflict, missing assignments, and problems at home. Respond using focusing and a purposeful question.
“There’s a lot happening with friends, schoolwork, and home. Which feels most important for us to spend time on today?”
A student says, “I joke around so nobody knows when something bothers me.” Respond with advanced empathy, keeping your interpretation tentative.
“I wonder if joking helps you feel protected, while another part of you wants someone to notice when you’re hurting. Does that fit?”
An elementary student says, “Nobody wants to play with me.” Give a person-centered response that communicates empathy.
“You’re feeling left out, and you really want someone to include you.”