This West Loop pizza institution is beloved by many, but deeply championed by mom & dad. Theres a ~super thin~ chance that anyone likes the pizza more than them.
Nancy's
This marital status, (hint: non-marital status) is deeply related to dad’s purchase of the boat.
A Widow. Father bought his boat from a widow.
This federal informant often creates YouTube content that Father used to consume ~2-3 years ago.
DJ VLAD
This Washington destination is something McKenzie & Dad have in common. We saw the dynamic duo in full action in 2025.
Wash U St. Louis
Reasonably referred to as “B-Dub”, this is father’s recent new colored friend that he sometimes shares food with.
BB the Cat
This savory condiment, championed by both the white man, Undercover Brother, & Mom/Edward, is the antithesis of Father’s food-compatibility.
Mayonnaise
This was the shocking reason dad got rid of the Murano Car
Smoking / Caught on Fire
This newspaper used to always be purchased by Dad.
The Sun Times
This cross-road was Father’s home growing up.
14th & Kedvale
This Polo G 2019 hit reminds father of the gritty struggle of the Chicago Jungle: “We come from poverty, man, we ain't have a thing”
Pop Out / Animosity
After a long basketball game at Rowan Park, no meal was complete without Dad taking Edward to the grocery store. The day would ~stink~ if a beverage & savory tacos weren't accompanied by this item.
BooBoo LooBoo
This affectionate name was bestowed upon one of father’s vehicles that “burnt out” at the end of its life
Muranjo
This riveting video format, “occasionally viewed by Dad, known as the “____” prank” often features a stunning woman and a man with a great car.
Gold Digger
For this many years, Dad had the final say in the courtroom.
15 years
This item often served as definitive proof that Father visited McKenzie and Edward at night.
A Cap
This term, infinitely worse than a 1 out of 10, is father’s go-to term to voice disapproval of a restaurant.
“A Zero”
Sporty & sleek, this vehicle remains on Dad’s bucket list.
Corvette
These two animals, a horse and it’s 8-legged distant companion, frequently grazed the kitchen table and provided a manual, on demand entertainment to Edward and Mckenzie. Their names?
Orson the Horson & the Spider
This is Dad's often-forgotten middle name.
Trick question - he doesn't have one
The average person in the world has 0.7 cellphones today (6Bn phones / 9Bn people), yet this quantity, Dad’s number of phones, is notably higher.
3
A warm, comforting cocktail made with a base spirit & a some sour. Father’s go-to when sick.
A Hot Toddy
Since Edward and McKenzie were born, Dad has held the keys to this many different cars.
5 (murano, alpha romeo, cadillac, buick, acura)
Dad’s favorite current NBA Player
Jalen Brunson / Jordan Walsh?
Name of the Party Dad threw each year when younger
Lonely Hearts Ball?
This reason, controversial or “immoral” to some, but perfectly reasonable to us, is why Dad likes Shadow less than Ash.
He’s BLACK