Healthy vs. Unhealthy Relationships
Liking someone as a friend means you enjoy spending time with them and care about them.
Having a crush means you may have romantic feelings for someone. You might want to date them or hold their hand.
If you have a crush on someone, is it okay to hug or hold their hand without asking?
No. You should ask first. You can say, "Would you like a hug?" Wait for their answer before touching them.
If you have a crush on someone, how could you tell them you like them?
You could say, "I like you, and I would like to get to know you better. Would you like to spend time together?"
If you ask someone to be your boyfriend or girlfriend and they say no, what should you do?
Respect their answer. You could say, "Okay, thank you for telling me." It is okay to feel sad, but you must respect their choice.
If someone you're dating asks for your phone password, do you have to give it to them?
No. You have the right to keep your password private. Trust does not mean sharing every password or private message.
If you have a crush on someone, does that mean they have to like you back?
No. You can like someone, but they do not have to like you back. Everyone gets to choose who they like.
If your boyfriend or girlfriend doesn't want to hug or kiss you, what should you do?
Respect their answer. You can say, "Okay, that's fine." Never force someone to hug or kiss you.
If someone tells you they have a crush on you, but you don't feel the same way, what could you say?
You could say, "Thank you for telling me. I think you are nice, but I only want to be friends."
If someone says they don't want to date you, is it okay to keep asking them to change their mind?
No. If someone says no, you should stop asking. Everyone has the right to choose whether they want to date someone.
If someone says, "If you really love me, you'll do this," is that a healthy way to ask for something?
No. Someone who cares about you should respect your choices. You can say no, even if they say they love you.
Is it okay to have a boyfriend or girlfriend and still have other friends?
Yes! It is healthy to have other friends. You can care about your boyfriend or girlfriend and still spend time with other people.
If someone says "no" to physical affection, can they change their mind later?
Yes. Someone can change their mind. They can say yes another time, but they can also say no again. Their choice must always be respected.
If your boyfriend or girlfriend does something that hurts your feelings, how could you tell them?
You could say, "That hurt my feelings. Please don't do that again." Talk calmly and explain what upset you.
If you're dating someone, do you have to hug, kiss, or hold their hand whenever they want?
No. Dating someone does not mean you have to touch them or let them touch you. Both people must agree to physical affection.
If someone you like asks you to send a private picture of your body, what should you do?
You do not have to send the picture. It is safest not to send nude or sexual pictures. You can say, "No, I don't want to send that." If the person keeps asking or makes you feel uncomfortable, stop responding if you can and talk to a trusted adult. If someone threatens you or shares a private picture, ask a trusted adult for help right away. You are not to blame for someone else's threats or behavior.
If someone you're dating tells you who you can and cannot talk to, is that healthy or unhealthy?
That is unhealthy. A boyfriend or girlfriend should not control who you talk to. You have the right to have friends and make your own choices.
Is it okay to tell someone you don't want to be touched, even if they're your boyfriend or girlfriend?
Yes! Your body belongs to you. You can say no to touching at any time, even when you are dating someone.
If you feel jealous because someone you like is talking to another person, what could you do?
Take a deep breath and remember that people can have other friends. You could talk about your feelings calmly or do something you enjoy to help yourself feel better. Do not try to control who the other person talks to.
If you like someone but they only want to be friends, how can you respect their feelings?
Accept their choice and treat them kindly. If being friends feels too hard, it is okay to take some space.
If your boyfriend or girlfriend gets angry whenever you spend time with other friends, what could you do?
Remember that you have the right to have other friends. You can explain that friendships are important to you. If your boyfriend or girlfriend keeps trying to control you or makes you feel afraid, talk to a trusted adult.
Name three things that make a dating relationship healthy.
Respect: Treating each other kindly.
Trust: Being honest with each other.
Communication: Talking and listening to each other.
What else?...
If someone liked holding your hand yesterday, does that mean they want to hold your hand today?
No. You need to ask each time. Someone may want to hold hands one day and not the next day.
If you're upset with someone you're dating, is it better to yell at them, ignore them, or calmly explain how you feel? Why?
It is better to calmly explain how you feel. Yelling can hurt someone's feelings, and ignoring someone does not explain what is wrong. If you need time to calm down, you can take a break and talk later.
If you no longer want to date someone, is it okay to end the relationship?
Yes. You have the right to end a relationship. You can say, "I don't want to date anymore." You do not have to stay in a relationship you no longer want.
Who is a trusted adult you could talk to if someone you're dating makes you feel scared, pressured, or uncomfortable?
You could talk to:
A parent or caregiver you trust.
A teacher or school counselor.
A trusted family member.
A social worker or another support professional.
Another safe adult who listens and takes you seriously.
If the first adult does not help, tell another trusted adult. You deserve to feel safe.