Rocking around the Christmas tree...
...at the Christmas party hop
Total night owl working in logistics. I prefer nice girls, but I keep an eye on the bad ones. Big sweet tooth, if I see a treat I cannot help myself.
Santa Claus
Traditionally made on "Stir-up Sunday," this dense holiday dessert is famously cooked with a silver coin hidden inside to bring wealth to whoever finds it in their slice.
Plum Pudding or Christmas Pudding
Anatomy: Facial Appendage
Diagnosis: Chronic nasal hyper-luminescence that activates during low-visibility atmospheric conditions.
Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer
Named for its signature indent, this buttery cookie is rolled in chopped nuts, pressed in the center, and filled with jam or chocolate.
Thumbprint Cookie
Sleigh bells ring, are you listening? In the lane...
..snow is glistening
Outgoing guy with a magnetic, icy smile. Fair-weather dater - when things heat up, I tend to completely melt away and disappear.
Frosty the Snowman
In Home Alone, Kevin McCallister treats himself to this specific classic meal right before the Wet Bandits break in.
Kraft Dinner
Anatomy: Cardiac Tissue
Diagnosis: Extreme micro-cardia that miraculously expanded three full sizes in a 24-hour period.
The Grinch
Characterized by a distinctive cracked pattern on top, these soft cookies are made by rolling balls of dark chocolate dough in powdered sugar before baking.
Crinkle cookies
Strings of streetlights, even stoplights...
...blink a bright red and green
Total workaholic with a net worth that'll blow you away. Extremely frugal, strictly cold-hearted, and I prefer eating my gruel in complete silence. Looking for someone cheap who won't ask me for a single penny.
Ebenezer Scrooge
In Elf, Buddy explains the four main food groups for elves: candy, candy canes, candy corn, and this
Maple Syrup
Anatomy: Oral Cavity
Diagnosis: Total dental extraction on an apex predator, resulting in sudden, complete loss of aggression.
The Abominable Snow Monster (or Bumble)
These melt-in-your-mouth, spherical pecan cookies are rolled in confectioners' sugar twice—once while hot and once after cooling—to look like festive winter spheres.
Snowball Cookies
Where the treetops glisten and children listen...
...to hear sleigh bells in the snow
High-maintenance guy with a fiery temper. Tropical vacations only—if you like the cold, we won't work out. My brother thinks he's cooler than me, but mom says that we are equal in her eyes. Looking for someone who doesn't mind a partner who's a little too much.
In A Christmas Story, after the Bumpus hounds destroy the Christmas turkey, the Parker family ends up having Christmas dinner at a Chinese restaurant eating this main dish
Peking Duck
Anatomy: Cranial & Facial Epidermis
Diagnosis: Severe third-degree thermal trauma resulting in a permanent, house-key-shaped scar on the palm, or a red-hot iron print burned onto the face.
Marv or Harry
Made from a rich, cream cheese-based dough, these crescent-shaped Jewish holiday pastries are rolled around a filling of cinnamon, walnuts, and fruit preserves before baking
Rugelach
They know that Santa's on his way, he's loaded lots of toys and goodies on his sleigh...
...and every mother's child is gonna spy to see if reindeer really know how to fly
Rough-around-the-edges outdoorsman obsessed with finding the ultimate treasure. I spend my days licking metal tools and making bold moves, but honestly, it all tastes like peppermint to me. Looking for a partner who can survive steep cliffs, wild sled rides, and guys with giant teeth.
Yukon Cornelius
This festive log-shaped dessert takes its name directly from the ancient European tradition of burning a massive piece of wood in the hearth on Christmas Eve.
Yule Log (or if you're fancy, Bûche de Noël)
Anatomy: Dermal Structure
Diagnosis: Sub-zero tissue composition with a blue complexion, severe heat intolerance, and icicle hair growth.
The Snow Miser
Translating literally to "pepper nuts," these tiny, dense German holiday treats get their signature warm kick from ground white pepper, cardamon, and cloves under a white sugar glaze.
Pfeffernüsse