Communication
What type of communication is direct, honest, and kind?
Assertive Communication
What can you do before responding when you are angry?
Take deep breaths, walk away, use coping skills, etc
What are potential outcomes of using revenge/retaliation to navigate conflict?
The problem/conflict continues and remains unresolved. You may feel guilty. You may hurt the other person. This could lead to negative consequences for yourself.
(It will only hurt you in the long run)
What is a boundary?
rules people set for themselves in relationships to protect their well-being, time, and emotional energy.
What can you do if someone repeatedly disrespects your boundaries?
End the relationship/create distance
Directly address the situation. Use assertive communication and I statements to tell them how you feel. Ex: "I feel sad when we don't talk at school much. Is everything okay?"
hurt, fear, embarrassment, sadness
Your friend leaves you on "read" for three days but is active on social media. Instead of assuming they hate you, what could you do?
Ask them what is going on
What is the format for a boundary?
If ____then I will ____.
(Must follow through with what you say!)
A friend says, "If you were really my friend, you'd do it." This behavior is called this.
guilt tripping/manipulation
How does the GIVE skill help us with communication?
It allows us to communicate healthily and strengthen the relationship with the other person by validating and approaching situations kindly.
Managing emotions without lashing out demonstrates what?
Self-control
You find out your best friend is hanging out with people who openly talk badly about you. Before immediately ending the friendship, what could you do to maintain healthy boundaries?
Have a direct conversation with them, express how you feel, and assert your needs.
What are the two boundary extremes?
Rigid and Porous
Your friend invites you over to hang out and you say, "No, I'm not in the mood to hang out today." Is this assertive or aggressive?
Assertive. You are allowed to say no, this is not mean.
What DBT skill helps us to express our feelings and needs to get a desired outcome?
DEARMAN
True or False: If Sally does something that makes you feel angry, then Sally is responsible for your emotions.
FALSE! You are responsible for your own emotions.
Your friend posts something that seems directed at you. What do you do?
Seek clarification. Ask them directly if it is about you.
What are common traits of someone with porous boundaries?
overly trusting, lets others walk all over them, oversharing,always says yes, puts others first, doesn't stand up for themselves, etc.
What is active listening?
Showing interest in what someone is saying by using eye contact, body language, reflections, and giving your full attention.
What does DEARMAN stand for?
be Direct, Express feelings, Assert needs, Reinforce, be Mindful, Appear confident, and Negotiate.
When is the best time to talk through an issue that you are very upset about?
After both people have regulated and calmed down so that the conversation can be more productive.
Advocate for yourself by stating the facts of the situation calmly.
What are some common traits of someone with rigid boundaries?
walls up, aggressive, do not trust others, isolate, keep people at a distance, says no
When someone immediately makes excuses or refuses to listen to feedback, they are showing what?
Defensiveness