Flexible Thinking
Mallory and Andy are playing soccer together. Andy wins the game as she has more goals than Mallory making Mallory upset. What should Mallory say to Andy when the game is over?
Mallory could tell Andy "Good Game!" or "Thanks for playing!" She could also remember that games are just for fun and it is okay if we don't win.
Your sister accidentally eats the last cookie that your Mom made and you wanted it. Is this a small or big problem?
Small Problem! You can find a different snack or make new cookies with your mom.
You start playing with scissors when your babysitter walks out of the room. You pretend to cut your hair. Is this safe or unsafe?
Unsafe! What should you do instead?
You ask to get ice cream with your friends, but your parents tell you no because it is too late. How should you respond?
You could say "Ok, maybe I can go next time when it is earlier?" You could also ask to have ice cream at home since you could not go get ice cream.
You just got to eat your favorite food for dinner and get to pick out the movie to watch with your family. You have a smile on your face and lots of energy. What is your body feeling?
You may be feeling happy or excited! You have a smile on your face and you feel very energetic because you are doing some of your favorite things.
You want to use markers to color your picture, but another kid is using them for his craft. Your teacher says you could use crayons instead. What should you do?
You could ask the other kid to share some of his markers or you could use crayons or colored pencils instead.
Joseph left his favorite water bottle at school and won't get it back until Monday. Is this a big or small problem?
Small Problem
Bonus: How might Joseph be feeling? How would you feel?
Alice sees an ice cream truck in her neighborhood and wants to get ice cream. Instead of asking her mom, Alice leaves the house to get ice cream alone. Is this safe or unsafe?
Unsafe! What could she do instead?
Your mom asks you to clean up your room, but you are in the middle of doing homework. What should you say to your mom?
Bonus: How would this answer change if you were playing video games?
You could tell your mom that you are doing homework by saying, "I am doing homework, but can help you when I am done." You could also take a break from homework if you are at a good stopping point.
Bonus: You should listen to your mom's direction first instead of playing video games. You can pause the video game and clean your room first before continuing to play.
Scared! You may be shaking because you are scared of the storm and what your parents to be nearby for a hug. Your belly might feel like there are butterflies in it.
Graham is on vacation with his family and is really excited to go to a baseball game. When it started raining, the game got cancelled and rescheduled for the next night. Graham is very upset... How could he be a flexible thinker?
Graham should first take a deep breath or use a tool from his toolbox. Next, Graham could express how he is feeling and then remind himself that the baseball game is tomorrow night. He should remember to be a palm tree thinker and recognize that sometimes plans change and that's ok.
You have been looking forward to a field trip to the aquarium for a long time. When you wake up, your body is sick and you can't go on the field trip. Is this a big or small problem?
This may be a BIG problem to you and that's ok. It is ok to be upset that you are sick and can't go, but remember to use your coping strategies to calm your body down. You can use the day to rest and watch your favorite movies.
Kaylin is wanting to go into the Zoo after her family parked in the parking lot. She decides to grab her mom's hand and wait until her family is ready to go. Is this safe or unsafe?
Safe! Kaylin waited for her family and held an adult's hand when crossing the street.
Bonus: What would be an unsafe choice?
In math class, Gabe is having a hard time with a math problem when the rest of his friends are finished with the assignment. What could Gabe do?
Gabe could ask his teacher or a friend for help. Sometimes it can be hard to ask for help in front of others, but it would make Gabe feel better when he asks for help and is able to finish his math assignment.
After getting home from school, you learn that your dog is missing. Your body suddenly becomes heavy and tired, you may feel like your heart is hurting, and you might start to cry. What are you feeling?
Sad! Your body is telling you it is sad through your arms and legs feeling heavy and your heart hurts because you miss your dog. Crying is a normal thing that happens when we feel sad.
Larissa's friends all want to get pizza for dinner even though she wants to have McDonalds. Larissa refuses to eat the pizza and hides in her room while her other friends eat. How could she be a flexible thinker?
Larissa could express that she wants McDonalds, but needs to understand that the rest of her friends want pizza. Larissa could remember that she does like to eat pizza still and it's one of her friend's favorite food. She is being a kind friend by letting her friends choose dinner and showing palm tree thinking.
Rylan is playing a board game with his family and comes in last place. Rylan is upset and feels like he never wins a game when he plays with his family. Is this a small or big problem?
Small! While Rylan is allowed to be upset, it is important for him to remember that board games are meant to be fun and he is not going to win every time. He should tell his family good job and play a different game.
Morris is playing on the playground and decides he wants to swing. Morris decides to run behind the swings where he ends of falling and getting hit by the other kids swinging. Is this a safe or unsafe choice?
Unsafe! Morris should have made sure the kids were slowing down or stopped before running behind them to use a swing. He could have also asked for help from an adult so they could safely help him on the swings.
One of your friends is not being very kind to another one of your classmates. During recess your friend starts to make fun of them causing your classmate to get upset. What should you do?
You could either stand up to your friend and tell them they are not being nice to your other classmate, or you could get the teacher to help you. You should be a kind friend and help out your classmate who is feeling upset.
Your brother stole your favorite toy while you were playing with it. You suddenly feel really hot, have tight fists, and feel like you could scream. What are you feeling?
Angry! Your body may get really hot and sweaty when you are angry. You may feel like screaming or hitting your brother, but that is not the best way to handle the situation.
Bonus: How could you handle your angry feelings?
Katrina is playing a game with a friend where they have to work together. Katrina's friend shares her idea, but Katrina interrupts her and says that her idea is better. When her friend decides to do her own thing, Katrina gets upset because she doesn't like her friend's choice. How could Katrina be a flexible thinker?
Katrina could use flexible thinking and listen to her friend's idea and try that idea before suggesting her own. Katrina also can be flexible by recognizing her friend can do things differently than her as everyone is unique and does things the way that works best for them.
Laurence is riding on his new bike that he got for his birthday when it all of a sudden breaks. Laurence is really upset because this was his favorite birthday gift. Is this a small or big problem?
This could be a BIG problem. Laurence may feel like this is a big problem because his bike broke, but it is important that Laurence uses his tools that make him feel calm. It is likely that his bike can be fixed and he can ride his bike again.
You are feeling really wiggly and want to crash into something to feel better. You decide to move a large bean bag so you can jump on to it instead of climbing on unstable pieces of furniture or running in to something else. Is this safe or unsafe?
Safe! You are doing a great job of recognizing what your body needs. When we are feeling wiggly our body may feel like it needs to bounce, jump, and crash, but it is important that we do this safely. A bean bag is a great choice to make sure our body is safe instead of running like crazy in a busy space.
Natalia really wants a phone but her parents do not think it is time to get one. Natalia wants a phone because all of her friends have one, but her parents always tell her no when she asks. How should she respond to her parents?
Natalia should share her wants with her parents in a calm and kind voice. She should not yell at them or say mean things that would make them sad or upset. She also should actively listen to her parent's reasoning and remember that her parents are trying to keep her safe with these rules.
After school you decide to work on homework at your little sister's dance practice. The music feels to loud, the homework is hard, and you can't seem to focus on this one math problem. Your mind seems fuzzy, your heart feels like it is beating fast, and you feel like you will never get this homework done. What are you feeling?
Bonus: How could you help your body feel better?
You may be feeling overwhelmed or stressed! Your body is trying to tell you it needs a break so it can focus on the homework. It may be helpful to get a drink, go for a short walk, or take a break from your homework until you are in a quieter space.