Passive, Aggressive, or Assertive?
“Can you please stop interrupting me?”
Assertive 👑
“Give me my pencil back NOW.”
“Can I please have my pencil back?”
What does E stand for?
Express
Your friend keeps borrowing your charger without asking.
“Hey, I noticed you’ve borrowed my charger a few times without asking. I feel frustrated because sometimes I need it and can’t find it. Can you ask before taking it? That would help me know where my stuff is.”
Your friend leaves you on read for 2 days.
“I noticed you didn’t answer my messages for a couple days. I felt ignored and confused. Can you just let me know if you’re busy next time?”
“Whatever. It doesn’t matter.”
Passive 😶
“You never listen to me.”
“I feel frustrated when I’m interrupted.”
Which part means staying focused and not getting distracted?
Mindful
Someone keeps cutting you in line.
“You’ve cut in front of me a few times today. It’s frustrating because I’ve been waiting too. Can you go to the back of the line please?”
Someone spoils your favorite show.
“You told me what happened before I watched it. I felt annoyed because I was excited to see it myself. Please ask before talking about spoilers.”
“You’re so annoying. Shut up.”
Aggressive 👊
“I hate all of you.”
“I feel left out right now.”
Which part means being willing to compromise?
Negotiate
A friend keeps posting embarrassing photos of you.
“I saw that you posted that picture of me online. I felt embarrassed and uncomfortable. Can you please take it down and ask before posting pictures of me next time? That would help me feel respected.”
Your friend only talks to you when they need answers.
“I’ve noticed you mostly text me when you need homework answers. It makes me feel used sometimes. I’d like us to talk more outside of school stuff too.”
“I felt embarrassed when you laughed at me.”
Assertive 👑
“Leave me alone forever.”
“I need some space right now.”
Which part explains the positive outcome?
Reinforce
Someone keeps making jokes about you even after you asked them to stop.
“I’ve already asked for the jokes to stop, but they keep happening. I feel hurt and embarrassed when it continues. I need you to stop making jokes about me. If it stops, I’ll feel more comfortable around you.”
Someone loudly complains about the food during meals every day.
“I’ve noticed there’s a lot of negative talk about meals. It makes me more anxious during eating times. Can we try to keep meal conversations more neutral?”
“I guess I just won’t ask anymore.”
Passive 😶
“You’re fake.”
“I felt hurt when you talked about me.”
Which part means asking clearly for what you want?
Assert
Your peer keeps commenting on what you eat during meals.
“I noticed you’ve been commenting on my food during meals. It makes me feel uncomfortable and anxious. Please stop commenting on what I’m eating. It would help me focus better on my recovery.”
You feel pressured when others talk negatively about recovery.
“Sometimes the negative comments about treatment affect me. I’m trying hard to stay focused on recovery. Can we try to be mindful about how we talk about treatment around each other?”