What two things can you never eat for breakfast?
Lunch and dinner
What is orange and sounds like a parrot?
carrot
What has a face and two hands but no arms or legs?
a clock
During what month do people sleep the least?
Febuary, it's the shortest month
What taste better than it smells?
A tongue
What word becomes shorter when you add two letters to it?
short
two children are born on the same day by the same mother but they are not twins. How is that possible?
They're triplets
What goes up but never comes down?
Age
How much dirt is there in a hole that measures two feet by three feet by four feet?
There is no dirt because it is a hole.
What gets wetter the more it dries?
A towel
Jonny's mother had three children. The first one was named april. The second was named may. What was the third named?
Jonny
Before Mt.Everest was discovered what was the tallest mountain in the world?
Mt.Everest it just wasn't discovered.
What has four wheels and flies?
A garbage truck
What kind of room has no doors or windows?
Mushrooms
Which word in the dictionary is spelled incorrectly?
Incorrectly
What goes up and down but never moves?
the stairs
A man goes out in heavy rain he comes back and his hair is not wet. How come?
he is bald
How many months in a year have 28 days?
All of them.
what grows when it eats, but dies when it drinks?
fire.
You can't keep this until you have given it?
A promise
Ten ladies tried to fit under a small umbrella,none of them got wet. How come?
It wasn't raining
What has a bottom at the top?
Your legs
What spends all the time on the floor but never gets dirty?
Your shadow
If two is company and three is a crowd what is four and five?
9 of course
Jim is six feet tall, he works at a butcher's, and he wears size ten shoes. What does he weigj?
Meat