I made a pun about the wind but it blows
The wind blows
Saying something "blows" means it's bad or not as good as you thought it would be
I'm feeling blue.
You don't actually look blue, you are just sad. This is an emotion often conveyed by the color blue in pictures
She is as tough as nails
Nails are strong and hold things together.
If someone is as tough as nails, they are strong and can take a lot of challenges.
Why was Dumbo sad? He felt irrelephant.
Dumbo is an elephant
Irrelevant = necessary or not needed; feeling irrelevant may make someone feel sad
I can’t believe I got fired from the calendar factory. All I did was take a day off!
Taking a day off could mean taking a 1 day vacation.
It could also mean removing a day from the calendars you are making (which would make them inaccurate!)
I don’t trust stairs because they’re always up to something.
"Up to something" means you are doing something mischievous so we might not be able to trust you.
Stairs go up.
His words cut deeper than a knife
Words don't materialize into sharp objects. In this metaphor, someone has said something hurtful to another.
You look as white as a ghost
If someone looks as white as a ghost, it means they may look pale or sick.
The teacher growls at Little Johnny, “Is that bubble gum in your mouth?! In the trash can! Right now!”
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Little Johnny, “The bubble gum too?”
The teacher meant put the bubble gum in the trash can.
Johnny thought the teacher was telling him to get into the trash can.
My friend’s bakery burned down last night. Now his business is toast.
When you cook bread, it turns into toast. So now the bakers business isn't selling bread, its selling toast.
We say something is "toast" when something no longer exists or is in big trouble
I had a crazy dream last night! I was swimming in an ocean of orange soda. Turns out it was just a Fanta sea.
Fantasy.
Sea of Fanta soda
This is the icing on the cake.
Icing can make a cake, something that is already good, even better. An extra bonus opportunity or an extra surprise (icing) can make an already good event (cake) even better. It is the ICING on the CAKE
My you are growing like a weed!
Weeds grow really fast.
If someone is growing like a weed, it means they are growing quickly
How do baseball players stay cool?
They sit next to their fans.
Fans can be people who love baseball and think baseball players are "cool"
Fans can also be the machine that spins and blows air
Never discuss infinity with a mathematician, they can go on about it forever.
Infinity = numbers go on forever
The mathematician can talk about something forever also.
The Middle Ages were called the Dark Ages because there were too many knights.
Nights = dark
Knights = around during the middle ages
Knight and night sound the same
Snow is a white blanket
Snow isn't actually a blanket, but it covers a the ground in the same way your blanket would cover your bed.
They fight like cats and dogs.
Cats and dogs are two animals that often do not get along and sometimes fight.
If two people fight like cats and dogs, they may bicker a lot or do not get along.
What do you call a seagull that flies over the bay?
A bagel.
A bay-gull like a sea-gull
bagel is something you eat
To the guy who invented zero, thanks for nothing
Zero is the same as nothing.
"Thanks for nothing" is something we say to be sarcastic (saying something we don't really mean) when someone does something that doesn't actually help us.
Getting the ability to fly would be so uplifting.
Something is "uplifting" when it puts you in a good mood.
The wind screamed in his face as he rode his bike.
The wind didn't actually scream, but the metaphor is used to show that the wind was blowing ferociously. Screams are also ferocious.
Your explanation is as clear as mud.
You cannot see through mud, it is not clear at all.
If something is clear as mud it means it is not clear at all and is, in fact, quite confusing.
Would it be possible to cross an eel with an eagle?
Absolutely not. That would be eeleagle.
Eel + Eagle = Eeleagleal
Also "illegal"
Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
Time goes by fast in the same way an arrow flies fast. Fruit flies enjoy eating a banana.