Foodies
What does a lemon need when it gets hurt?
Lemonade.
(lemon-aid)
A waist of time.
What do you call a deer with no eyes?
No idea (no eye dear)
Why is the maths textbook always unhappy?
Because it has too many problems to solve.
Why is Tesla expensive?
Because it charges a lot!
What happens if you put your hand in a blender?
You get a handshake.
What did 50 Cent do when he was hungry?
58
fifty eight = fifty ate
How do you count cows?
Using a calculator (caw-culator)!
I'm reading a book about anti-gravity and just cannot stop. Why?
Because it's impossible to put down!
How do celebrities (名人) stay cool?
They have many tons of fans!
Why did the mushroom go to the party?
He was a fun guy
(=fungi 菌类).
Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?
Because it was two tired. (it was too tired)
(tire=tyre 轮胎)
Why is a leopard the worst at hiding?
Because it is always spotted!
Where do Maths teachers go on vacation?
Time Square.
What part of the body always loses?
The feet. (defeat)
Where do fruits go on vacation?
Pear-is!
What does a house wear?
Address.
(a dress)
What do you call a fish wearing a bowtie?
So-fish-ticated. (Sophisticated)
What is the longest word in the English language?
Smiles, because the first and last letters are a mile apart.
How does a computer eat lunch?
(In mega-bites)