Hit pause
What is one physical sign that you're starting to feel angry?
Increased heart rate, tense muscles, clenched jaw, flushed face
What’s the difference between assertive and aggressive communication?
Assertive = respectful and direct. Aggressive = forceful, blaming, or disrespectful.
True or False: Setting boundaries makes you selfish.
False
What is a support system?
A group of people you trust and can lean on for help or encouragement.
What does it mean to “listen to understand” instead of “listen to reply”?
You focus on their message instead of planning your response.
True or False: Anger is a bad emotion that should be avoided.
False — Anger is a normal, valid emotion; it’s how we express it that matters.
What’s one phrase you can use to express your needs assertively?
“I feel… when… because… I need…” (or “I” statements)
If someone gets upset when you set a boundary, what can you remind yourself?
Their reaction doesn’t mean your boundary is wrong. You can be kind and firm.
True or False: Only people in crisis need a support system.
False — Everyone benefits from connection and support.
True or False: Assertive listening means agreeing with the other person.
False – It means you listen with respect, not that you must agree.
What’s one healthy way to pause or cool down when you feel anger rising?
Deep breathing, stepping away, counting to 10, splashing cold water
True or False: Being assertive means you always get your way.
False — Assertiveness is about expressing yourself, not controlling others’ responses.
What is one sign you may need to set a boundary with someone?
Feeling drained, resentful, anxious, or overwhelmed around them.
What’s one barrier that might stop someone from reaching out for support?
Pride, shame, past rejection, or not knowing how to ask.
How can you stay calm when listening to something that triggers you?
Use grounding tools like slow breathing or take a break respectfully.
What’s one thing anger might be trying to protect you from underneath?
Hurt, fear, shame, powerlessness, or feeling disrespected
What DBT acronym can help you remember how to ask for what you need while maintaining self-respect?
DEAR MAN
What emotion often makes it hard to set boundaries?
Guilt or fear
What’s a way to build your support system even if you feel isolated?
Join a group, attend meetings, reconnect with old friends, or ask for help in therapy.
What body language helps you show someone you’re really listening?
Eye contact, nodding, open posture, and limited distractions.
You feel disrespected in a conversation. What DBT or CBT skill could you use to respond without exploding?
DEAR MAN, assertive “I” statements, cognitive reframing, or grounding techniques
If someone interrupts you repeatedly, what is an assertive response you could give?
“I’d like to finish what I was saying, and then I’d love to hear your thoughts.”
What DBT skill helps you maintain self-respect while setting boundaries?
FAST (Fair, no Apologies, Stick to values, Truthful)
What’s a barrier that can stop someone from using their support system—and how can you challenge it?
Fear of being a burden → Reframe: "People who care want to help."
What’s one way assertive listening helps relationships?
It builds trust, reduces misunderstandings, and shows respect.