The Anger Files
Anger doesn't really come from the event that "made" you angry. It comes from this.
Your interpretation of the event
Gratitude isn't luck or a mood that just happens. It's this.
A choice (a daily practice)
In "Who am I?" these sit at the centre of who you are and steer your choices.
Your values
You get a bad grade and instantly think "the teacher's out to get me" The wise move: recognise that's only this, not a fact.
One interpretation / an assumption (worth questioning
Maria's hat, the water-crystal idea, and Hinton's joy all point to the same place real change comes from. Where?
From within
Lord Buddha compared holding onto anger to grasping one of these — you're the one who gets burned:
A) A snowball
B) A hot coal
C) A sword
Anthony Ray Hinton said that if he stayed angry and unforgiving, his captors would have taken this from him:
A) His money
B) The rest of his life
C) His friends
Knowing your one main value is most useful when you're facing this.
A hard or conflicting decision
Stuck in a group project with people who work differently? The smart move is to use everyone's these toward a shared goal.
strengths
Friendship "deposits & withdrawals" and anger's "hot coal" share one insight about our actions. What is it?
What you put out comes back to you — kindness builds you up; harm rebounds onto you.
Add one letter to the front of the word ANGER and you get this warning word:
A) Hunger
B) Danger
C) Anchor
B) Danger
Choosing to forgive someone mainly does this for you — it's not really about the other person.
Frees you / protects your own peace and future
An ethical dilemma is tough not because it's right-vs-wrong, but because it's this.
Two goods (or two bads) in conflict — values clashing
Scrolling makes everyone's life look better than yours. The wise move: catch the negative-thinking trap and shift toward this.
Gratitude/a positive reframe
The sequoia roots holding each other up, and all our teamwork lessons, teach the same truth about people. What?
We grow stronger together — interdependence
When someone lashes out at you, the wise way to see them is that they're really THIS — and need love, not a lecture.
In pain
Name two everyday blessings we usually forget to be grateful for.
our body/health, family, food, freedom, the senses, a roof, etc
A great trick when you're stuck on a hard choice: ask what advice you'd give to whom?
A) A stranger
B) A good friend
C) A celebrity
B) a good friend
A friend snaps at you for no clear reason. The understanding response assumes they might be this.
In pain / having a hard time
(Daily Double) — Across emotions and anger, we said the very first step to managing any feeling is the same. What is it?
Awareness — recognising and naming the feeling (and its trigger).
(Daily Double) — Breathing and a walk are good "quick fixes", but the deeper solution to anger is doing this.
Changing your thoughts/beliefs/perspective
Gratitude is considered a strength, not just a nice feeling. In one sentence, why — especially when life is hard?
It keeps your joy in your own hands, so hardship and other people can't own your happiness
The word "ethics" comes from the Greek ethos, which means:
A) Law
B) Character
C) Wisdom
B) Character
You feel anger surging in the moment. Name the in-the-moment tool you'd use and the longer-term work you'd save for later.
In the moment: breathe / walk it off / water + calm.
Later: work on the thoughts & perspective behind it
In one sentence, state the single biggest idea of our entire year.
You can't control what happens, but you can always choose your response (your thoughts, attitude, and actions).
(Other answers welcome!)