THAT’S WHAT SHE SAID
This household item has settings for “low”, “medium”, and “high” and often disappoints people
What is a shower head
This drink convinces you karaoke is a good idea
What is tequila
The absolute worst place to hear “We need to talk”
What is a car
This bill arrives monthly and still shocks you every time.
What is electricity
You rub it faster when it’s cold
What are your hands
You usually grab it when it’s hot, twist it slowly, and regret it if you rush.
What is a jar lid.
The drink most likely to come with regret, glitter, and a stranger’s Snapchat.
What is vodka Red Bull
The worst time to realize your phone battery is at 1%
What is when there’s a burglary
The moment you realize naps are now a reward, not a punishment
What is adulthood
It’s better when warmed up first.
What is a car engine
People argue over the size, shape and whether it’s better homemade or store-bought
What is pizza
This brunch drink makes you feel productive while doing absolutely nothing
What is a mimosa
The worst time for your body to betray you with a noise
What is a silent room
This phrase means “I will absolutely forget”
What is “I’ll remember”
You complain if it’s too dry
What is food
It’s firm when new, softer with use, and everyone pretends brand doesn’t matter
What is a mattress
The drink that tastes like juice but hits like a truck
What is a Long Island Iced Tea
The worst moment to remember something embarrassing from 10 years ago.
What is 3 A.M.
The first thing adults Google before buying literally anything
What are reviews.
You shouldn’t force or it breaks.
What is a zipper.
If it’s too small, people complain. If it’s too big, it’s “overkill”.
What is a TV
This drink ordered exclusively by people say “I’m fine” when they are not.
What is wine.
The worst time to realize your mic is not muted.
What is during a work meeting.
This age makes you start saying “kids these days” unironically.
What is 30
If you shake it too hard, it makes a mess
What is soda