With Teachers Behaviors
A student fell asleep during class
1. expected or unexpected?
2. what step of communication?
3. how does it make others think/feel?
4. how do others treat the student?
5. how does the student think/feel?
1. unexpected
2. Step 1, Step 2
3. unimportant, "Why can't you just pay attention?"
4. yell at you
5. "Why are you yelling at me?", shocked, confused, annoyed
Your teacher made a typo on the test.
1. What is the size of the problem?
2. What would be an expected response?
3. What would be an unexpected response?
1. small
2. let it go
3. interrupted the class to tell the teacher they made a typo
Susan was performing on stage in a play and kept turning her body towards the back of the stage. What step of communication is or is not being used?
Step 2
Your family is playing a board game and you brother lost the game. He pushed back his chair, stood up and starting shouting at everyone.
1. expected or unexpected?
2. what step of communication?
3. how does it make others think/feel?
4. how do others treat you?
5. how does the student think/feel?
1. unexpected
2. Step 1, 4
3. confused, alarmed, frightened, frustrated, "Why is he getting so angry? It's just a game." "He always loses his temper. I don't ever want to play with him again."
4. rudely, won't play with him next time he asks, ignore his outburst, parents may punish him, won't include him in future family board games
Your friend texts you that they are sick and going to miss school today. So, after school you stop by their house to bring them their homework.
1. expected or unexpected?
2. what step of communication?
3. how does it make others think/feel?
4. how do others treat you?
5. how does the student think/feel?
1. expected
2. Step 1
3. "I'm glad she remembered me." appreciated, loved, cared for
4. say "thank you", care/respect in return
5. encouraged, warm hearted
When a student curses during class...
1. expected or unexpected?
2. what step of communication?
3. how does it make others think/feel?
4. how do others treat the student?
5. how does the student think/feel?
1. unexpected
2. step 1 & 4
3. "he doesn't have a filter", "he doesn't understand the rules", "I wish he would follow the rules", annoyed, frustrated
4. constantly reminding of rules
5. annoyed
You are jogging in a race and fall and break your leg.
1. What is the size of the problem?
2. What would be an expected response?
3. What would be an unexpected response?
1. big
2. someone calls 911, you are sent to the hospital
3. everybody ignores you, no one helps you
Your friend won't stop talking about the new book she got. Every time she brings it up, you just roll your eyes and walk away. What step of communication are you/are you not using?
Step 2
You are playing your game until your mom tells you to wash the dishes. You turn off your game and go to the kitchen to do your chore.
1. expected or unexpected?
2. what step of communication?
3. how does it make others think/feel?
4. how do others treat you?
5. how does the student think/feel?
1. expected
2. Step 1
3. "I'm glad he did what I told him to do." pleased, encouraged
4. say "thank you", give you a privilege
5. glad, encouraged, proud, "That wasn't so bad."
Your friend is telling you about their vacation. You do a whopping topic change and begin talking about your new shoes.
1. expected or unexpected?
2. what step of communication?
3. how does it make others think/feel?
4. how do others treat you?
5. how does the student think/feel?
1. unexpected
2. Step 1, 4
3. "I she/he listening to me?" "Do they care about my vacation?" confused, annoyed
4. may not be interested in your topic, may ignore, may not want to continue talking with you
5. "Why did he/she stop talking to me?" confused, sad, bummed
The teacher is writing something on the board and you are listening, facing forward, looking at the teacher, taking notes, keeping your feet on the floor, not talking to your neighbors.
1. expected or unexpected?
2. what step of communication?
3. how does it make others think/feel?
4. how do others treat the student?
5. how does the student think/feel?
1. expected
2. Step 2
3. "I'm glad he/she is listening to me." "It makes it so much easier to teacher when I don't have to remind students to pay attention." pleased, encouraged
4. respect, give praise
5. encouraged, proud, "I'm glad I'm doing what the teacher says, I'm glad I'm showing them respect."
You are driving down the freeway and see a car on the side of the road and looking in the window as you drive past, it seems as though the driver is unconscious.
1. What is the size of the problem?
2. What would be an expected response?
3. What would be an unexpected response?
1. big
2. call 911
3. honking at everyone around you
You enter the classroom after taking a bathroom break. Before sitting down, you take a second to look around the room and observe what the rest of the students are doing. What step of communication are you using?
Step 3, Thinking With Your Eyes
Your baby sister is asleep and you keep on making noises, even after your parent asks you to be quiet.
1. expected or unexpected?
2. what step of communication?
3. how does it make others think/feel?
4. how do others treat you?
5. how does the student think/feel?
1. unexpected
2. Step 1, Step 3
3. "What does he/she keep on making noises?" "Why won't they listen to me?" annoyed, uncomfortable, worried
4. provide consequence for not following directions; send you outside or to your room
5. hurt, frustrated "Why do they care more about her than me?"
You like to play a game with your friend and every time you win, you brag about it.
1. expected or unexpected?
2. what step of communication?
3. how does it make others think/feel?
4. how do others treat you?
5. how does the student think/feel?
1. unexpected
2. Step 1, 4
3.
Your teacher is giving a lecture and you are wondering around the classroom.
1. expected or unexpected?
2. what 3 steps of communication?
3. how does it make others think/feel?
4. how do others treat the student?
5. how does the student think/feel?
1. unexpected
2. Step 2, Step 1, Step 3
3. "Why is he walking around?" "He should be sitting down and paying attention." "That is so distracting." annoyed, uncomfortable, distracted
4. remind him what he should be doing, provide consequences, leave him out during recess/lunch
5. lonely, confused "Why don't they want to hang out with me?"
You left your lunch at home and have no money to buy lunch, but you are super hungry.
1. What is the size of the problem?
2. What would be an expected response?
3. What would be an unexpected response?
1. medium
2. borrow lunch money or call parents to bring food
3. go without food and be hungry the rest of the day and can't focus on your test in last period; yelling and throwing chairs; stealing someone else's food
Your mom is lecturing you about keeping a clean room and as soon as she takes a breath you say "Can I go to Joey's house?" What step(s) of communication are you not using?
Step 1, 3, 4
Quietly sitting on the couch, watching a movie with family members.
1. expected or unexpected?
2. what step of communication?
3. how does it make others think/feel?
4. how do others treat you?
5. how does the student think/feel?
1. expected
2. Step 1
3. comfortable, content, "It's nice that no one is ruining the movie for me"
4. be silent as well, respectful
5. grateful, comfortable, content
You are having a conversation with a friend, and ask the same question 3x in a row.
1. expected or unexpected?
2. what step of communication?
3. how does it make others think/feel?
4. how do others treat you?
5. how does the student think/feel?
1. unexpected
2. Step 1, 4
3. "Why are they asking me the same question?" "They must not be very interested in the conversation." confused, uncomfortable
4. ignore your question
5. confused, annoyed, frustrated
Constantly asking questions when teacher is lecturing
1. expected or unexpected?
2. what step(s) of communication?
3. how does it make others think/feel?
4. how do others treat the student?
5. how does the student think/feel?
1. unexpected
2. Step 3, 1
3. irritated, "Why do they keep asking so many questions?" "I can't even follow the lesson because it keeps getting interrupted."
4. ignore them, may make unexpected comments towards them
5. hurt, confused
It's your first day at a new school and the bully in the class makes fun of your glasses.
1. What is the size of the problem?
2. What would be an expected response?
3. What would be an unexpected response?
1. small
2. ask them politely to please stop
3. make fun of them in return
After hearing a knock on the door, you open the door and quickly decide you wish you hadn't. You know right away that the person at your door is a salesman. What step of communication did you use?
Step 3
Your brother is working on a difficult puzzle and you offer to help. He declines your help but you start putting together pieces anyway.
1. expected or unexpected?
2. what step of communication?
3. how does it make others think/feel?
4. how do others treat you?
5. how does the student think/feel?
1. unexpected
2. Step 1
3. "Why is she helping me, even though I told her not to." "I wish she would go away." annoyed, frustrated
4. aggressively, make rude comments, yell
5. confused, guilty, hurt
You are having a conversation with your friend and keep asking questions to get the conversation moving. Your friend answers the questions with short responses and then doesn't ask any questions in return.
1. expected or unexpected?
2. what step of communication?
3. how does it make others think/feel?
4. how do others treat you?
5. how does the student think/feel?
1. unexpected
2. Step 1, 4
3. confused, frustrated, "Why are they not asking any questions about me?" "Do they even want to be talking to me?" "They don't seem very interested."
4. unfairly, ignore you, stop talking to you
5. confused, frustrated, hurt, sad