Diaper Duty
How many wipes does it usually take to clean up a newborn blowout?
It often takes 5–10 wipes. Wrong answer? Fold a dish towel into a makeshift diaper and tie it around your head until your next turn.
In which country was jarred baby food popularized in the 1920s by Gerber?
The United States. Incorrect guess and you must eat a spoonful of plain unsalted oatmeal.
Which zodiac sign corresponds to a due date in late December through early January?
Capricorn. Wrong answer? You must read your partner’s weekly horoscope in a dramatic voice.
Finish the line from “Rock‑a‑bye Baby” after “when the wind blows…”
The cradle will rock. If you forget, sing the whole rhyme solo in your best lullaby voice.
Name one weird thing parents do at 3 AM trying to get a baby to sleep.
Acceptable answers include scrolling on the phone, rocking back and forth, or Googling “why won’t my baby sleep?” Failure to name one means you must yawn loudly for 30 seconds on cue.
Name three diaper‑bag essentials besides diapers and wipes.
Acceptable answers include extra clothes, hand sanitizer, plastic bags, burp cloths, pacifiers, snacks, etc. Fail to name three and you must fill a tote bag with random household items and carry it everywhere until your next clue.
Blindfolded, smell a spoon of fruit puree and guess whether it’s apple, banana or pear.
Correct guesses get the points. Losers take a spoonful of stevia powder.
Name one trait you think the baby will definitely inherit from their parents and one trait you hope they won’t.
Share one trait the baby will inherit (e.g., Dad’s laugh) and one you hope they won’t (e.g., Mom’s temper). If the group isn’t entertained, the losers reveal an embarrassing childhood nickname.
Sing the alphabet song backwards from Z down to T without error.
If you stumble, the winners get to fashion a bib for you out of paper towels that you must wear.
One partner lies on the floor with arms at their side while the other swaddles them tightly in a blanket. Fastest and neatest swaddle wins.
Losing team must shuffle around the room like a swaddled burrito delivering snacks.
Using your non‑dominant hand, draw a diaper. The group will vote for the best drawing.
Everyone votes on the best diaper drawing. The losing team wears their towel diaper on their head and must answer the next clue with a pacifier (or spoon) in their mouth.
Using condiments on hand—ketchup, mustard, hot sauce, honey—craft the most disgusting "baby food" combo for your partner to taste. The group will vote on which concoction is the worst.
We’ll vote on whose concoction is worst. The creators of the worst mix earn the points; the other team must swallow a spoon of the baby food mixed with hot sauce.
Write down a baby name that would horrify Grandma.
Group votes on shock factor. Losers wear a sticky‑note name tag with their entry until their next turn.
Compose two lines that rhyme and roast your partner under the guise of a nursery rhyme.
The crowd decides. Losers write “I love diapers” on their forehead with washable marker until their next turn.
Without speaking, act out how you react when you hear a huge crash on the baby monitor at night.
Funniest interpretation wins. Losers hold a plank position while singing “Itsy Bitsy Spider” start to finish.
While blindfolded, diaper a stuffed animal or pillow. The fastest to secure the diaper wins.
The fastest team wins. Losers take a deep sniff of left over Chicharrones oil (no tasting) to simulate a stinky diaper.
Without using words, act out the misery of feeding a baby at 3 AM when you haven’t slept at all.
Most realistic or funniest performance wins. Losing team fills their mouth with water and hums “Twinkle Twinkle Little Star” without spilling.
Predict the age in months the baby will sleep through the night, take their first steps and say their first word. Closest to the group median wins.
Closest to the group median wins. Farthest guesses must crawl and babble like a toddler for the next two rounds.
Unscramble the letters U R E N S Y R H Y E M R to form a specific fraze.
The letters spell ‘NURSERY RHYME.’ First team to shout it wins. Losing team must speak only in rhyme until their next clue.
Blindfolds on! Measure exactly one cup of water using any containers you can find.
The closest measurement wins. Furthest off must chug a cup of lukewarm milk.
It’s the dirty diaper relay! One partner wraps the other’s waist in toilet paper like a giant diaper while reciting an embarrassing baby story about them. First to finish wins.
First to finish wins. Losing team must reload the winners’ plates and drinks for the rest of the game and wear a paper ‘Diaper Duty’ sash.
Pitch three revolting baby‑food flavours that should never exist and passionately defend why babies need them.
The biggest laugh wins. Losing team must mix apple cider vinegar, stevia and ketchup into a shot and take it.
Lightning round! In 15 seconds, answer: What will be the baby’s first job? Who will they call when they get into teenage trouble? What weird hobby will they pick up?
Answer quickly and amusingly. Failure to respond quickly or hilariously means you lose and must act as personal attendants (snacks, water) to the winners for the rest of the game.
Each team must deliver a 20-second closing argument explaining why the other team would be the worse parent at 3 AM.
Rules: You cannot say “because,” “just,” or “literally.”
Extra point style: include one compliment mid-roast.
Group votes. Losers must speak in a baby voice until their next turn.
Sleepless trivia gauntlet! Answer all three correctly: (1) Which hormone helps you feel sleepy at night? (2) What is the longest recorded amount of time a human has stayed awake (within 1 day)? (3) True or false: newborns sleep more than 16 hours per day. Fail any of them and you lose.
Correct answers: melatonin; about 11 days (~264 hours); true. Winners claim the points; losers must simulate giving birth.