You use a car to play soccer because human legs are apparently obsolete
Rocket league
You commit structural property damage using depressed poultry as ammunition against farm animals.
Angery birds
In 1859, a homesick British settler released 24 of these long-eared animals for hunting, accidentally triggering an unstoppable, continent-wide ecological crisis in Australia
Rabbits
This iconic, bouncy children's toy was originally invented in 1943 by a naval engineer trying to create a spring that could stabilize sensitive instruments on ships.
Slinky
Weighing up to 1,500 pounds, this massive Arctic predator is the largest land meat-eater on Earth, possessing paws the size of dinner plates that can take down a walrus.
Polar bear
You punch trees to build a dirt hut while dodging exploding green pen shaped monsters
Minecraft
temple run
In 1985, Coca-Cola faced national outrage, boycotts, and thousands of angry phone calls after changing its 99-year-old formula to create this failed beverage.
New coke
Invented in 1891 by a cleaner who used a wooden box and a broom handle, this household appliance was originally marketed as an "Electric Suction Sweeper."
Vacuum cleaner
Don't let the goofy grin fool you—this ocean apex predator can reach 20 feet in length, detect a single drop of blood from miles away, and bites with two tons of force.
Great white shark
You spend hours brushing your horse and maintaining your facial hair only to die of tuberculosis anyway
RDR 2
You are trapped in a diabetic fever dream where a creepy disembodied voice praises you for lining up identical sweets.
Candy crush
Emus
Before becoming a staple of children's arts and crafts, this squishy, colorful modeling compound was originally sold in the 1930s as a wallpaper cleaner to remove soot.
PLay-doh
This massive African mammal looks slow and chubby, but it can run 20 mph, snap a crocodile in half with its teeth, and causes more human deaths than lions.
hippopotamus
You get beaten up by a senile old man with glowing stick because you refused to set yourself on fire.
Dark souls
Clash of clans
To circumvent currency issues in 1989, the Soviet Union traded a massive fleet of 17 submarines, a frigate, and a cruiser to this American soft drink company.
Pepsi
Invented by a engineer trying to build a wallpaper substitute, this plastic packaging material was originally intended to be textured, multi-layered wallpaper
bubble wrap
Growing up to 20 feet long and weighing over a ton, the saltwater variety of this armored reptile has the strongest measured bite force of any animal alive today.
crocodile
You go on a cross country road trip with a teenager just to throw a brick at a guys face.
Last of us
You spend your life vandalizing public transit while running away from an obese police officer and his aggressive dog.
Subway surfers
In 1788, the Austrian army accidentally attacked itself in the town of Karánsebes after a drunken argument over buying this specific type of alcohol, resulting in thousands of friendly-fire casualties.
SCHNAPPS
Now a multi-billion dollar erectile dysfunction medication, this Pfizer drug was originally developed in the 1990s as a treatment for high blood pressure and chest pain.
viegra
Armed with five-inch claws and a bite strong enough to crush a bowling ball, the grizzly variety of this mammal can sprint at 35 mph to run down its prey
grizzly bear