Emotional, Reasonable, or Wise Mind
Just the facts
Reasonable Mind
Keeping awareness in the current moment
Mindfulness
5 parts of Self Soothe
Sight, sound, taste, smell, touch
Sometimes called "black and white" thinking
Ex: If I'm not perfect I have failed
All or Nothing
Blowing things out of proportion or inappropriately shrinking something to make it seem less important
Magnification (catastrophising) and minimisation
What I WANT to do
Emotional mind
Acknowledging what you have control over and what you don't
Radical acceptance
STOPP
Stop: Don't act immediately. Wait.
Take a breath: Slowly breathe in and out a couple of times
Observe: What am I thinking/ feeling?
Pull back: See the bigger picture
Practice what works: Do what will help the most
Ex: I'm a loser
Ex: I'm completely useless
Ex: They're such an idiot
Labeling
Blaming yourself or taking responsibility for something that wasn't completely your fault. Conversely, blaming other people for something that was your fault.
Personalization
Opinions
Emotional mind
Even in the middle of a difficult situation or stress, find something to be happy about or something that is enjoyable
Half-smile
Activities
Contributing
Comparisons
Emotions
Pushing away
Thoughts
Sensations
Assuming that because we feel a certain way what we think must be true
Emotional reasoning
Ex: Mind reading - imagining we know what others are thinking
Ex: Fortune telling - predicting the future
Jumping to conclusions
Grasps the bigger picture, not just parts of the picture
Wise Mind
Checking in with yourself, both inside and on the outside
"Moment to Pause"
TTIPP Skills
Tip the Temperature of your face with cold water
Intense exercise
Paced breathing
Paired muscle relaxation
Using critical words like "should", "must", or "ought" can make us feel guilty or like we have already failed
Should Must
Only paying attention to certain types of evidence
Mental filter
Logical and rational thinking
Reasonable Mind
Understanding that emotions and impulses are always with us. They come and go. They are strong at times and weak at other times. This is called harnessing the energy of your emotions.
Ride the Wave
DEAR MAN Skills
Describe the situation, just the facts
Express feelings
Assert
Reward
Mindful
Appear confident
Negotiate
Discounting the good things that have happened or that you have done for some reason or another
Ex: That doesn't count
Disqualifying the positive
Seeing a pattern based on a single event, or being overly broad in the conclusions we draw
Over-generalizing