Baptism
Oil they put on the freshly baptized baby
Chrism
Forgive me father, for I have sinned. I took pencils from the Catholic school kid's desk.
Theft
SHAME on you for eating meat on a Lent Friday. You should have had this giant south american rodent, which we officially don't count as meat.
Capybara
Three parts of the trinity
The Father, the Son, the Holy Spirit
Briefly exiled and suppressed, this order of priests now runs 28 American universities, some of which are surprisingly good at basketball
Jesuits
Title used to refer to the Bishop (especially during Confirmation)
Your Excellency
Forgive me father, for I have sinned. I have claimed that the communion wafer merely represents the body of our lord and savior, when in reality it becomes his body.
Heresy
SHAME on you for being a CAPE Christian, going to church on only these days
Christmas, Ash Wednesday, Palm Sunday, Easter
Take a knee, boys, we're entering a pew
Genuflect
Marywood University and the St. Joesephs center are both sponsored by nuns from this order, whose acronym is IHM
Immaculate Heart of Mary
Say a Hail Mary
Amen
Forgive me father, for I have sinned. I cast a hex on my neighbor's yippee little dog.
Witchcraft
SHAME on you for taking the lord's name in vain. You said this three-word phrase, meaning incidentally
By the way
Eucharist holder
Tabernacle
This order crusading knights was disbanded in 1312. Unless you ask Abstergo Industries, that is.
Knights Templar
Peace be with you
And with your spirit
Forgive me father, for I have sinned. I sold my cousin Constantinius an episcopacy. That means he's a bishop now, father, in case you didn't know. That word is a bit archaic, and most people think it solely refers to Episcopalians. That's just a cheap rip-off of Catholicism, father. Anyway, yeah, long story short, i sold a religious office.
Simony
SHAME on you for leaving church after communion, you missed this step of the mass.
Concluding Rites
The priests are wearing pink! It must be this weekend.
Third weekend of Advent
This Catholic Fraternal Society sells life insurance, steak sandwiches, and, for some reason, swords
Knights of Columbus
What does CCD stand for?
Confraternity of Christian Doctrine
Forgive me father, for I have sinned. Or, you know what, don't, because I have completely forsaken my Christian faith and am leaving the Church.
Apostasy
SHAME on you for not reconciling your venial sins. you are banished to thiis place to await your cleansing of sin
Purgatory
Move over Franco Harris, we're talking about the immaculate conception, when this figure was conceived
Mary
LEEEOOOO! The American pope is a member of this order, the first to reach the papacy.
Augustinians