Marvelous Minhagim
This sure gets dizzy this time of year!
Dreidel
Before starting to light me, put me here for all to see!
Window, doorway, or outside
"This temple you weak Jews built is so empty! It needs our Greek idols! Which bayit is it, anyway?"
Second Temple
When Channukah candles we do light, how many minutes must they burn bright?
30
The wicked king! He did to the Jews a terrible thing!
Antiochus
Why spend what you can eat?
Chanukkah Gelt
Higher or lower is just fine, but don't put me in that line!
Shamash
"HA! Who cares about Matityahu... How do you say his last name?"
Chashmonai
After lighting all 8 days, how many lighting brachot did you say?
17
Think twice before you let her in, and again before you eat anything!
Yehudit
We usually eat what makes this at our seudot! Don't get too sleepy!
Dairy
The best way is to add or subtract, it depends who you ask!
Lighting Candles
"Listen up, Jews! Stop doing these three mitzvot right now!"
Shabbos, Rosh Chodesh, Brit Milah
After the night numbered four, there are still candles left to light, but how much more?
30
Five brave sons
Yochanan, Shimon, Yehuda, Elazar, Yonatan
YOU ARE FIRED... At least while there is fire!
Women
Usually two at most we read, but this year on this day, triplets! THREE!
Shabbos Rosh Chodesh Chanukkah
"I really shouldn't accept these from a dirty Jew, but I'm so hungry that I'll make an exception. "
Cheese and Wine
The mitzvah of Chanukkah candles is not set in stone. How many different ways can you light in your home?
3
"Fewer as you go, like the bulls on Sukkot"
Beit Shammai
A light meal, get it?!
Oil-fried foods
On Rosh Chodesh, the moon ain't full and neither is this, but this time it is!
Hallel
"YES! Mine Just killed one of the Maccabees! These Jews don't stand a chance against our war beasts!"
Elephants
This Chanukkat Hamizbeach was 8 days strong. For the Mishkan in the Midbar, it was how long?
12
I told him to think twice before letting her in!
Holofernes