What Style?
Scenarios
Role Play
Matching
"I" Statements
100
In which style of communication do people avoid expressing their feelings, rights, and/or needs? This often leads to difficult feelings building up until an eventual explosion- followed by shame/guilt.
Passive communication
100
Simon ran into Kaitlyn by mistake, knocking her down. Kaitlyn used a curse word and shouted, “You’re going to be sorry you ever did that!”. Her fists are clenched and she is ignores Simon’s apology. Which style of communication is Kaitlyn using?
Aggressive Communication.
100
Someone cuts in front of you in line at the store.
Show a passive response.
A passive response might be to do and say nothing, to step aside, make excuses for their behavior, or apologize.
"Well she only has a couple of items anyway"
"that's okay, I'm not in a rush"
"I'm sorry for being in the way"
100
-Interrupting
-Demanding
-Blaming
Which communication style is being described?
Aggressive communication
100
True or False:
"I" statements are a way of taking responsibility for our own feelings while describing a problem.
True!
"I" statements help to navigate issues and work toward problem solving. This communication tactic also has conflict de-escalation benefits.
200
In which style of communication do people express their feelings/opinion/needs in a way that violates the rights of others?
Aggressive Communication
200
When George took Andy's seat in class, Andy smiled and said "no problem" even though he was angry. Later, Andy purposely knocked over Georges things and told him it was an accident.
Which style of communication is Andy using?
Passive-Aggressive communication. He made it seem like he was being kind and cooperative, but he actually used disruptive sabotage to "get even".
200
A person in your group is making inappropriate jokes that are offensive to you.
Show an assertive response.
This response should express your feelings/needs/rights etc. and be communicated in a firm and calm way.
"I feel hurt by those jokes, and others might too. For us to have a good time it's important to be respectful of each other. I really like the jokes you made with the play on words!"
200
-Controlled and Calm
-Honest
-Problem Solving
Which communication style is being described?
Assertive Communication
200
True or False
"I" Statements typically involve feeling words or descriptions of emotions.True!
"I" statements are often set up in this way:
"I feel" followed by an emotion word (angry, sad, scared, etc.) and an explanation.
Example: "I feel anxious when you raise your voice."
300
In which style of communication do people express their feelings/opinion/needs indirectly? This often shows the person acting out of anger in a subtle way or secretly. Their messages don’t usually reflect their actual thoughts.
Passive-Aggressive Communication
300
Arianna always backs out of plans last minute. Yesterday she missed a special dinner Jenna prepared for her, once again. Jenna said "I feel frustrated when we make plans and you don't follow through. If nothing changes, it will impact our relationship. Our friendship will be stronger if we use better communication.
What communication style is Jenna using?
Assertive Communication. Jenna used an appropriate tone and volume. She expressed her feelings and expectations while being respectful to Arianna.
300
Someone uses your favorite cup without asking.
Show an aggressive response.
An aggressive response would violate safety rules. It is often an impulsive overreaction. You might shout, criticize, or make threats.
"You IDIOT! You know that's my cup. Give it back to me or I'll kick you in the neck!"
300
-Poor Eye Contact and Slumped Posture
-Soft Spoken or Apologetic
-Avoids Self-Expression
Which communication style is being described?
Passive Communication
300
True or False:
This is an "I" statement- "I feel worried when you come home so late."
True. It involves a description of feeling an an explanation of the issue or problem. The speaker is taking responsibility for his/her emotions without using blaming or shaming.
400
In which style of communication do people clearly express their feelings/opinion/needs, and advocate for their rights while respecting the rights of others?
Assertive Communication
400
Tom's wife asks him if he would do the dishes after dinner. Tom rolls his eyes and says "Of course, I'd LOVE to do the dishes, even though I worked all day today.
What communication style is Tom using?
Passive-Aggressive Communication
400
Your sister accidentally spills her drink on your important papers.
Show an aggressive response.
An aggressive response would violate safety rules. It is often an impulsive overreaction. You might shout, criticize, or make threats.
"You're so clumsy and now you've ruined everything! I'm going to get you for this!"
400
-Manipulative
-Subtle Sabotage
-Sarcasm
Which communication style is being described?
Passive Aggressive Communication
400
True or False:
This is an "I" statement- "I feel like you're being kind of stupid."
False! It's a "you" statement in disguise.
This statement does not describe an emotion. It does not show that the speaker is taking responsibility, and instead is using criticizing. It is not a positive way to start problem solving.
500
Use an assertive style of communication to respond:
The person behind you on the airplane is kicking your seat and you're feeling anxious and frustrated.
Was your response firm but gentle?
Was it confident?
Did it violate anyone's safety?
Was it calm and respectful?
500
Jayden is bullied at school. He often lets it go and doesn’t say anything- and when he does he is usually the one apologizing. Today he is sent to the principal’s office for screaming at others. What style of communication best represents Jayden?
Passive Communication- remember, this style often leads to an outburst and then a return to being passive.
500
Your roommate keeps leaving their dirty dishes on the counters, making it hard for you to cook meals.
Show a passive-aggressive response.
A passive-aggressive response might involve sarcasm, or sabotage. You might not say anything about the problem directly, but sabotage by putting the messy dishes in their room, or start doing other things to inconvenience them for revenge.
"Don't worry. I'm not busy or anything. I enjoy cleaning up your mess."
500
Which communication style is this person most likely using? List three reasons.
Aggressive communication.
-Lacks personal space
-Pointing finger in a threatening way
-Scowling face
-Furrowed eyebrows
-Tightened mouth
-Scrunched nose
500
How can you change this thought into an "I" statement?
"You never call me. You must not care, I guess we won't talk anymore."
"I feel hurt when you go so long without calling. I'm afraid you don't care."
This response is more accurate, and honest. It is less likely to cause damage to relationships and more likely to create space for problem solving.