Situation: A coworker asks you to help with a project after work, but you already have plans.
Response: "Um... okay, I guess I can stay."
Answer Key: Passive,
"I can't stay tonight because I already have plans. I hope the project goes well."
Situation: Your friend is 45 minutes late meeting you.
Response: "No worries. I only sat here waiting forever."
Answer Key: Passive-Aggressive
"I was frustrated waiting. I'd appreciate a text if you're running late."
Situation: Your sibling borrows money and never pays you back.
Response: "Sure, here's more money."
Answer: Passive
"I can't lend you more money until the previous loan has been repaid."
Situation: Someone asks a personal question you're uncomfortable answering.
Response: "Why would you even ask me that?!"
Answer: Aggressive
"I'm not comfortable discussing that topic."
Situation: You're worried someone won't like your opinion.
Response:
"Whatever you want is fine."
Answer: Passive
"I actually have a different preference I'd like to share."
Situation: Your supervisor gives you a new task five minutes before your shift ends.
Response: "Sure, I can just stay late again."
Answer Key: Passive,
"I can start working on this now, but I won't be able to finish before I leave. What would you like me to prioritize?"
Situation: Your friend asks for a ride, but you're exhausted.
Response: "Yeah, I can do it."
Answer Key: Passive
"I can't give you a ride tonight because I need some time to rest."
Situation: A family member comments on your weight at every gathering.
Response: "Maybe you should worry about your own body."
Answer: Aggressive
"I'd rather not discuss my weight. Let's talk about something else."
Situation: A friend calls you late at night several times a week.
Response: "Can you not take a hint? There's a reason I've stopped answering your calls"
Answer: Passive-Aggressive
"I need to stop taking calls after 10 PM. Please call earlier if possible."
Situation: A group is deciding where to eat, and you dislike the restaurant everyone picked.
Response: "Sure, let's go there. It's not like my opinion matters."
Answer: Passive-Aggressive
"I'd prefer a different restaurant. Would everyone be open to considering another option?"
Situation: A coworker regularly interrupts you during meetings.
Response: "Whatever. Go ahead."
Answer Key: Passive-aggressive,
"I'd like to finish my thought before we move on."
Situation: A friend keeps borrowing things without asking.
Response: "Must be nice to use whatever you want."
Answer Key: Aggressive
"I'd like you to ask before borrowing my belongings."
Situation: Your parents pressure you to attend every family event.
Response: "Fine. I'll be there."
Answer: Passive
"I enjoy spending time with the family, but I won't be able to attend every gathering."
Situation: A coworker repeatedly asks you to do part of their job.
Response: "Absolutely not. Do your own work."
Answer: Aggressive
"I'm not able to take on your responsibilities. You'll need to complete that task yourself."
Situation: You're overwhelmed and someone asks you for another favor.
Response: "No. Leave me alone."
Answer: Aggressive
"I'm feeling overwhelmed right now and can't take on anything else."
Situation: A coworker speaks to you in a rude tone.
Response: "Maybe if you weren't so miserable, people would help you."
Answer Key: Aggressive,
"I'd like us to communicate respectfully so we can solve the issue together."
Situation: A friend repeatedly cancels plans at the last minute.
Response: "Don't worry. I wasn't excited anyway."
Answer Key: Passive-Aggressive
"I feel disappointed when plans are canceled at the last minute. I'd appreciate more notice if possible."
Situation: Your sibling leaves a mess in the shared living space.
Response: "I guess I'm the only person who knows how to clean."
Answer: Passive-Aggressive
"I'd appreciate it if you cleaned up after yourself in the shared spaces."
Situation: A friend becomes upset when you tell them no.
Response: "Never mind. I'll just do it."
Answer: Passive
"I understand you're disappointed, but I'm still unable to help this time."
Situation: You need help with a task but don't want to inconvenience anyone.
Response: (Says nothing and struggles alone.)
Answer: Passive
"I'm having difficulty with this and could use some help."
Situation: Your boss asks you to take on another project when you're already overwhelmed.
Response: "I'll figure it out somehow."
Answer Key: Passive
"My workload is currently full. Can we discuss what tasks should be reprioritized if this project needs to be completed?"
Situation: A friend makes jokes about you in front of others.
Response: "Keep it up. Maybe everyone can laugh at me all night."
Answer: Passive-Aggressive
"I know you're joking, but those comments make me uncomfortable. I'd appreciate it if you stopped."
Situation: A relative constantly gives unsolicited advice about your life.
Response: "Thanks for another opinion nobody asked for."
Answer: Aggressive
"I appreciate your concern, but I'm comfortable making this decision on my own."
Situation: Someone repeatedly ignores a boundary you've already discussed.
Response: "Apparently respecting boundaries is too much to ask."
Answer: Passive-Aggressive
"We've talked about this before, and it's important to me that this boundary is respected."
Situation: A friend repeatedly asks for reassurance about the same worry.
Response: "I've told you ten times already. Stop asking."
Answer: Aggressive
"I can tell you're anxious. I don't think repeating reassurance seeking is helping, but I'd be happy to talk about other ways to manage the worry."