Mindfulness
Definition: "Mindfulness is the ability to be aware of your thoughts, emotions, physical sensations, and actions—in the present moment—without.." what?
Answer: "judging or criticizing yourself, others, or your experience."
True or False: pain and suffering are always both inevitable.
False! While we can’t always control the pain in our lives, we can control the amount of suffering we have in response to that pain.
"I feel" vs "I feel like" are different why?
"I feel" is a feeling statement, like "I feel happy."
"I feel like" is a thought statement, like "I feel like you don't like me." Adding like removes the emotion, and doesn't let us express why we feel like someone doesn't like us.
Relationships require attention, and maintaining a good relationship depends on noticing the other person’s feelings and reactions and paying attention in the here and now.
This is known as _______ ________.
Mindful Attention.
When we aren't mindfully paying attention, we may miss vital clues like body language, tone, and projecting how we feel onto others.
Every day, when we check in, we use a Feelings Wheel for our emotions. What is another name that your counselor refers to this as?
The Wheel of Feels!
True or False: Being "zoned out" is an example of being in a mindful state.
False, this is an example of unmindful or being on autopilot.
REST, an acronym for a distress tolerance skill, stands for:
Relax
Evaluate
Set an intention
Take action
The first step to changing any problematic or self-destructive behavior—and to not act impulsively—is to use the REST strategy
True or False: Emotions are identified as either bad or good.
Giving the silent treatment or saying "It's fine" when it's really not is an example of what type of communication.
Passive Aggressive.
Name the six core emotions from the Feelings Wheel.
Happy
Sad
Surprise
Disgust
Fear
Anger
+600 bonus points if you guessed all 6!
An exercise in mindfulness is using a thought record for X minutes. What amount is X?
X = 3 minutes! A practice that we practice every group!
The statement, " “I can’t change what’s already happened," is an example of _________ ___________.
Radical Acceptance
Bonus Tip: Keep in mind that radical acceptance does not mean that you condone or agree with bad behavior in others. But it does mean that you stop trying to change what’s happened by getting angry and blaming the situation.
What is a primary emotion?
Your initial reactions to what is happening to you are called primary emotions. These are strong feelings that come on quickly, that don’t involve having to think about what’s happening.
Being _______ sometimes seems safe because you just go along with what the other person wants and expects. Long term, this type of communication can create frustration and resentment that builds inside of you for abandoning your own needs.
Passive.
Name however many Ashleyism from group you can think of.
Give yourself some grace.
You gotta be at least a little bit uncomfortable to grow.
You're doing, not trying!
Give yourself credit.
Take your power back.
One minute at a time, sometimes one day at time is too much.
Brains gonna brain.
Many more...
+100 bonus points for each Ashleyism you guessed!
Being mindful means being in the _____ __ ______.
"here and now."
Will also accept being in the present, as well.
True or False: Distraction and avoidance are the same thing.
False! Distractions can provide temporary relief from distress, but you still have to come back to what you're distracting from in the first place. Avoidance means ignoring the situation all together. Avoidance won't make the problem go away, but distractions can help you to be in a better headspace to approach the distressing situations you're dealing with.
What is a secondary emotion?
In addition to experiencing primary emotions, it’s also possible to experience secondary emotions. These are emotional reactions to your primary emotions. Or to put it another way, secondary emotions are feelings about your feelings.
________ communication also destroy relationships because they push people away due to thinking things should be a certain way, according to your own opinion, and a need to control others.
Aggressive.
When you have a thinking error in your thought process, this is called a __________ ___________.
Cognitive distortion, from CBT!
Bonus +400 points if you can name at least one of the most common ones AND what it means.
True or False: meditation is not an example of being mindful.
False - it is a great example of being mindful!
You can engage in self-soothing by using what senses?
All of them! Each help bring awareness and mindfulness to the present and can increase distress tolerance.
What are emotions?
Bonus +500 if you can tell me which part of the brain they are processed in!
To put it simply, emotions are signals within your body that tell you what’s happening. They are electrical and chemical signals in your body that alert you to what is happening.
Then the signals travel to your brain, where they are processed in an area called the limbic system, which specializes in observing and processing emotions so that you can respond to emotional situations.
DEAR MAN, GIVE, and FAST are all acronyms in interpersonal effectiveness.
What does each letter stand for?
+500 bonus for each completed acronym you get right!
DEAR MAN: Describe Express Assert Reinforce (Stay) Mindful Appear Confident Negotiate
GIVE: (Be) Gentle (Act) Interested Validate (Use an) Easy manner
FAST: (Be) Fair (No) Apologies Stick to Values (Be) Truthful
Research shows that, as of 2017, there are a combination of _________ feelings we can experience.
34,000 and counting!