DEARMAN
GIVE-FAST
emotion regulation
IE Grab Bag
100
Letter in DEARMAN used when you stick to the facts of the current situation.
What is D: Describe.
100
The most important component of this four letter acronym is to validate.
What is GIVE
100

if I can name it I can tame it

why do we have to know what we are feeling

100
When we use observe, describe, and participate in interpersonal conversations we are using what IE skill?
What is mindfulness of others or core mindfulness skills.
200
Component of DEARMAN where you make your intentions clearly known by ASKING for what you want or SAYING NO clearly.
What is A: ASSERT.
200
The most important component of the four letter acronym is to maintain self-respect.
What is FAST
200

sleep , exersize . eat right

please skill

200
Everything is made of opposing forces/opposing sides. When we balance opposite points of view in conversations, we are using what?
What are Dialectics?
300
Component of DEARMAN where you let others know the positive benefits, or clarify the negative consequences of not getting what you want or need.
What is R: Reinforce.
300
While using this "flavor" of DEARMAN, we do not over apologize.
What is FAST
300

going out with friends for coffee, writing in a journal , listening to music

what is accumulate positive emotions

300
A skill in conversations where we are not necessarily agreeing with the other person, but we are acknowledging how there response makes sense in some way.
What is Validation (IE Handout 17)
400
Use a confident voice, make good eye contact, no stammering, whispering, staring at the floor, or retreating.
What is A: Appear Confident
400
Name two levels of validation that help expand the V in GIVE
What is pay attention, reflect back, read minds, understand, acknowledge the valid, show equality.
400

I am so stupid, this is not fair , she is so mean ….

what is judgement

400
Name two ways to self-validate.
Check all the facts, practice radical acceptance of yourself, self-sooth, remember that being invalidated is rarely a complete catastrophe, or other examples are acceptable.
500
If DEARMAN is not working effectively, this is a way to ask the other person how they would get what they want or say no if they were you.
What is Turn the Tables
500
Do a DEARMAN to another person in the room while using GIVE to maintain the relationship. Ask to borrow money.
Performs acceptable demonstration of the DEARMAN-GIVE.
500

approaching when feeling anxious

get active when sad


what is opposite action

500
Explain how to reinforce a behavior.
Add positive consequences or remove aversive consequences (other creative examples are acceptable). IE Handout 22.
M
e
n
u