Letter in DEARMAN used when you stick to the facts of the current situation.
What is D: Describe.
100
The most important component of this four letter acronym is to validate.
What is GIVE
100
You increase the likelihood of being effective when approaching conflict while in the BLUE ZONE or RED ZONE?
BLUE ZONE
100
When we use observe, describe, and participate in interpersonal conversations we are using what IE skill?
What is mindfulness of others or core mindfulness skills.
200
Component of DEARMAN where you make your intentions clearly known by ASKING for what you want or SAYING NO clearly.
What is A: ASSERT.
200
The most important component of the four letter acronym is to maintain self-respect.
What is FAST
200
TRUE or FALSE: Over-apologizing is the only way to maintain your self-respect.
FALSE: Don't over-apologize for your behavior, for making a request, or for being you.
(If you wronged someone, don't under-apologize)
200
Two opposite ideas can be true at the same time, and when considered together, can create a new truth and a new way of viewing the situation. There is always more than one way to think about a situation.
What is Dialectical?
300
Component of DEARMAN where you let others know the positive benefits, or clarify the negative consequences of not getting what you want or need.
What is R: Reinforce.
300
While using this "flavor" of DEARMAN, we do not over apologize.
What is FAST
300
Name two types of body language that would suggest you are listening to someone else while they are speaking.
1.) Eye contact
2.) Body turned towards the person
300
A skill in conversations where we are not necessarily agreeing with the other person, but we are acknowledging how there response makes sense in some way.
What is Validation (IE Handout 17)
400
Use a confident voice, make good eye contact, no stammering, whispering, staring at the floor, or retreating.
What is A: Appear Confident
400
Name two levels of validation that help expand the V in GIVE
What is pay attention, reflect back, read minds, understand, acknowledge the valid, show equality.
400
When you want to make peace,reduce conflict, and reduce anger you would use this skill
What is THINK skill
400
Name two ways to self-validate.
Check all the facts, practice radical acceptance of yourself, self-sooth, remember that being invalidated is rarely a complete catastrophe, or other examples are acceptable.
500
If DEARMAN is not working effectively, this is a way to ask the other person how they would get what they want or say no if they were you.
What is Turn the Tables
500
Do a DEARMAN to another person in the room while using GIVE to maintain the relationship. Ask to borrow money.
Performs acceptable demonstration of the DEARMAN-GIVE.
500
When other people are too powerful, have some reason for not liking you if you get what you want, or will not give you what you need unless you sacrifice your self-respect....this is an example of which component of "What Stops You from Achieving Your Goals?"
What is ENVIRONMENT. (pg. 86)
500
Explain how to reinforce a behavior.
Add positive consequences or remove aversive consequences (other creative examples are acceptable). IE Handout 22.