3 States of Mind
What is reasonable mind?
The state of mind based on logic, facts, and rational thinking.
What is Observe?
Noticing your internal or external experience without reacting, just watching.
What is Non-judgmentally?
Letting go of judgments and seeing things as they are, not as good or bad.
What is urge surfing?
A skill where you ride out an urge like a wave instead of acting on it.
What is alternate rebellion?
A safe, non-destructive way to rebel against expectations or rules.
What is Wise Mind?
The balanced mind that integrates Reasonable Mind and Emotion Mind.
What is Describe?
Putting words to what you observe without judgment.
What is One-mindfully?
Doing one thing at a time with full attention.
True or False: Urge surfing is about acting on the urge quickly.
False. It’s about not acting and letting the urge pass.
True or False: Alternate rebellion encourages self-destruction.
False. It offers a safer way to express independence or resistance.
The state of mind where emotions control thoughts and behavior.
What is Participate?
Becoming fully involved in the moment and letting go of self-consciousness.
What is Effectively?
Doing what works, not what feels right or fair.
What’s the goal of urge surfing?
To learn you can survive urges without acting on them.
Why does alternate rebellion work?
It gives you control without harming yourself or your goals.
Which state of mind combines logic and emotion?
Wise Mind.
Name the 3 "What" skills.
Observe, Describe, Participate.
Give an example of doing something “effectively.”
Calling a friend to cool off instead of posting something angry online.
What imagery can help with urge surfing?
Imagine an urge like a wave that rises, peaks, and falls — and you’re surfing it without falling off.
Give an example of alternate rebellion.
Wearing mismatched socks instead of skipping therapy.
Give an example of using Wise Mind.
Taking a deep breath and choosing not to yell in an argument, even though you're angry, because you know yelling won’t help.
How do you “Describe” without judgment?
Stick to facts. Example: “She frowned” instead of “She’s mad at me."
How do “What” and “How” skills work together?
“What” tells you what to do (Observe, Describe, Participate), and “How” tells you how to do it (Non-judgmentally, One-mindfully, Effectively).
Walk through 3 steps of urge surfing.
1. Notice the urge, 2. Breathe and observe it, 3. Let it rise and fall like a wave without acting on it.
When is alternate rebellion useful in DBT?
When you want to resist authority or rules but still stay on track with recovery.