Mindfulness
-Intentionally living with awareness in the present moment. (Waking up from automatic or rote behaviors to participate and be present to our own lives.)
-Without judging or rejecting the moment. (Noticing consequences, discerning helpfulness and harmfulness—but letting go of evaluating, avoiding, suppressing, or blocking the present moment.)
-Without attachment to the moment. (Attending to the experience of each new moment, rather than ignoring the present by clinging to the past or grabbing for the future.)
What is Mindfulness?
The 3 primary priorities we have when entering interactions/conversations with others. We often have to clarify which of the 3 is our top priority in order to select the appropriate interpersonal effectiveness skill.
What are Objectives, Relationship, and Self-Respect?
-Objective Effectiveness: Getting what you want from another person and being effective in asserting your rights and wishes.
-Relationship Effectiveness: Acting in such a way that you maintain positive relationships and that others feel good about themselves and about you.
-Self-Respect Effectiveness: Deciding how firm or intense you want to be in asking for something or saying no. How do I want to feel about myself after the interaction is over (whether or not I get the results or changes I want)?
Porous, Enmeshed, or Healthy
What are types of Boundaries?
-Being emotional means being out of control.
-If others don’t approve of my feelings, I obviously shouldn’t feel the way I do.
-It is inauthentic to try to change my emotions.
What are Myths about Emotions?
-Survive Crisis Situations Without Making Them Worse
-Accept Reality Replace Suffering and Being “Stuck” with Ordinary Pain and the Possibility of Moving Forward
-Become Free Of Having to Satisfy the Demands of Your Own Desires, Urges, and Intense Emotions
What is Goals of Distress Tolerance skills?
-Reduce suffering and increase happiness
-Increase control of your mind
-Experience reality as it is
What is Goals of Mindfulness?
The acronym we use to remember Objective Effectiveness (getting a need met, making a request, setting a boundary, etc.)
What is DEAR MAN?
Describe, Express, Assert, Reinforce
(Stay) Mindful, Appear Confident, Negotiate
Balancing opposites while entering the paradox of “yes” and “no,” “true” and “not true,” at the very same time.
What is Dialectics?
When your emotions do not fit the facts, or when acting on your emotions is not effective, using this skills can change your emotional reactions.
What is Opposite Action?
Describe what your "skills breakdown" point looks like. What behaviors, thoughts, emotions are present?
Any answer goes :)
-Seeing the value of both reason and emotion
-Bringing left brain and right brain together
-The middle path
What is Wise Mind?
Name the purpose of the FAST acronym in interpersonal effectiveness, AND what each letter stands for.
What is Self-Respect Effectiveness?
-(Be) Fair
-(No) Apologies
-Stick to your values
-(Be) Truthful
List 5 skills that can be used for grounding and bring you back to the present moment
Free response!
Pro-Tip: Gently touching your lips with two fingers can activate the PNS because the lips are rich with parasympathetic fibers.
The acronym/skills for reducing your vulnerability to Emotion Mind and living a life worth living.
What is ABC PLEASE?
-Accumulate Positives
-Build Mastery
-Cope Ahead
-PLEASE: Taking care of your mind by taking care of your body. Treat PhysicaL illness, balance Eating, avoid mood-Altering substances, balance Sleep, and get Exercise.
1. You have intense pain that cannot be helped quickly.
2. You want to act on your emotions, but it will only make things worse.
3. Emotion mind threatens to overwhelm you, and you need to stay skillful.
4. You are overwhelmed, yet demands must be met.
5. Arousal is extreme, but problems can’t be solved immediately.
What is When You Use Crisis Survival (Distress Tolerance) skills?
The 3 "WHAT" skills of mindfulness (what you do when practicing mindfulness)
What are Observe, Describe, Participate?
Pay Attention, Reflect Back, "Read Minds," Understand, Acknowledge the Valid, and Show Equality
What are the 6 Levels of Validation in the GIVE skill?
One of the two functionally distinct and continuously active divisions of the autonomic nervous system (ANS). It predominates in quiet “rest and digest” conditions. When we activate it, we are pumping the breaks on our fight-flight-freeze responses. Its main purpose is to conserve energy to be used later and to regulate bodily functions like digestion.
What is the Parasympathetic Nervous System (PNS)?
1. An important goal is blocked or a desired activity is interrupted or prevented.
2. You or someone you care about is attacked or hurt by others.
3. You or someone you care about is insulted or threatened by others.
4. The integrity or status of your social group is offended or threatened.
What are examples of when Anger fits the facts/is justified?
What the TIPP acronym stands for
-Temperature
-Intense Exercise
-Paced Breathing
-Progressive Muscle Relaxation
The 3 "HOW" skills of mindfulness (how you practice when practicing mindfulness)
What are Nonjudgmentally, One-Mindfully, and Effectively?
Name 5 of the 10 Factors to Consider when deciding how firm or intense you want to be in asking or saying no.
What is...
1. The other person’s or your own capability.
2. Your priorities.
3. The effect of your actions on your self-respect.
4. Your or the other’s moral and legal rights in the situation.
5. Your authority over the person (or his or hers over you).
6. The type of relationship you have with the person.
7. The effect of your action on long- versus short-term goals.
8. The degree of give and take in your relationship.
9. Whether you have done your homework to prepare.
10. The timing of your request or refusal.
What is the acronym for managing cravings and urges, AND what does each letter stand for?
DEADS
-Deny/Delay (don't give into the urge)
-Escape (triggers)
-Avoid, accept, or attack (the urge)
-Distract
-Substitute for addictive thinking
6 Steps for Checking the Facts skill
What is...
1. Ask: What is the emotion I want to change?
2. Ask: What is the event prompting my emotion? Describe the facts that you observed through your senses. Challenge judgments, absolutes, and black-and-white descriptions.
3. Ask: What are my interpretations, thoughts, and assumptions about the event? Think of other possible interpretations. Practice looking at all sides of a situation and all points of view. Test your interpretations and assumptions to see if they fit the facts.
4. Ask: Am I assuming a threat? Label the threat. Assess the probability that the threatening event will really occur. Think of as many other possible outcomes as you can.
5. Ask: What’s the catastrophe? Imagine the catastrophe really occurring. Imagine coping well with a catastrophe (through problem solving, coping ahead, or radical acceptance).
6. Ask: Does my emotion and/or its intensity fit the actual facts? Check out facts that fit each emotion. Ask Wise Mind.
Name 3 Reality Acceptance skills
-Radical Acceptance
-Turn the Mind
-Willingness
-Half-Smile
-Willing Hands
-Allowing the Mind: Mindfulness of Current Thoughts