DBT Terms
What does dialectics mean?
Different ways of looking at the situation.
No single view holds complete truth
Gets us out of black and white thinking
True or false
Being mindful means that I think about my to-do list when the teacher is talking, I scream at my guardians when I don't get what I want, and I think about how my body is feeling all the time.
False. Being mindful means I am present in the moment, learning, and using my five senses to ensure I can be calm, and in wise mind. I want to look at solving problems, and avoid escalating them.
Having this skill is helpful because it:
- Helps build relationships
- Develop trust and bonding between two or more people
- Create a positive learning space
- Help communicate clearly and effectively to support problem solving
- Limit conflict
Note- These are also called "people skills"
Interpersonal skills
True or False
There is always one way to solve a problem and more than one way to see a situation.
False.
When I can see more than one way to see a situation, there is always more than one way to solve the problem. My way to solve the problem is not the only way. I have to use my flexibility skills, mindfulness skills and patience.
I tend to react quickly, I don't pay attention to facts. If I don't like it, I don't do it. I am not always calm and as a result, I react often. I will say things I may regret. Who am I?
Emotion Mind
Provide 1 dialectical sentence.
** Hint- think about what word you need and what word you want to omit.
**Dialectical sentence includes AND and removes BUT so that people avoid defensiveness.
Being mindful is helpful for all of us. Provide one benefit of mindfulness.
Any of the following:
Gives you more control over your own behaviour
Helps make important decisions
Focus attention and be more productive
Increase compassion for self and others
Improve your over all health (less stressed)
This can be hard to maintain. It's a balance of getting what you want and maintaining your friendship. At times this can be hard for you, especially when your friends want to do something that goes against your feelings; your gut reaction. I've been told to trust my gut and learn to be assertive so that I have this.
Hint ________ _________ (two words)
Maintain self- respect
When I got an "F" on my science test, I talked to my teacher. I told him it was his fault that I got the F.
How did I look at solving the problem and what acronym should I have remembered?
- I blamed my teacher for my actions (getting an F on the test). Blaming people creates defensiveness and people will not work with me if I blame others.
- To solve the problem, getting what I want, I should have used DEARMAN
Describe- the situation. Stick to the facts
Express- I feel statements
Assert- Ask for what I want clearly
Reinforce- Reward the person ahead of time.
(be) mindful- Focus on what you want, avoid distractions
Appear confident- Maintain eye contact, confident voice
Negotiate- Be willing to give to get.
I am calm, cool and collected. I take other people's opinions and ideas into consideration. I am able to express how I feel using "I feel" statements. I am able to solve a problem, or be okay not solving the problem. Everyone is okay with the decision made. Who am I?
Wise mind
The goal of DBT is to balance ______ & _________
Acceptance & Change
Name one mindfulness activity
Visualization
Yoga
Mediation
Going for a nature walk
Deep breaths/breathing
5 senses
Sitting quietly
Eating or drinking something with awareness
The V in GIVE stands for _________
When do you use GIVE?
Validate.
Use GIVE when getting what you want isn't as important, and you want to maintain your relationship with the person.
Validating the other person's feelings can help discover another perspective and make the person feel you care.
Saying no immediately when someone wants something is sometimes okay. Provide one reason why it is okay. Provide one reason why it may not solve the problem/situation.
I can say no when I feel strongly about something Example: The wish/want goes against my values and/or I have a good relationship with the person asking for something.
One reason it may not help solve the problem:
- May not hear the other person's point of view
- The word "no" could offend someone without further explanation.
- May cause damage to the relationship
- The person may not feel validated
True or false.
I always have to be in wise mind?
False.
You don’t always have to be in Wise Mind; sometimes it is helpful to be in reasonable mind, especially when working on something that needs a lot of focus and logic. Sometimes, you want to experience your emotions and enjoy them. The key is to not live in the extremes of Emotion Mind or Reasonable Mind.
Provide a dialectical statement
Examples can include:
This is hard AND I can do it.
I don't enjoy fish AND I can try the new recipe my guardian is making
I am getting into so much trouble AND I can ask for help
This is the only way we will get better at mindfulness!
PRACTICE!
If I am _______, I am respectful, confident and calm. I state what I want/need, and understand how the other person may feel. I take the other person's thoughts/opinions into consideration. I don't talk over the person. I repeat over and over again to get what I need/want. Sometimes, I don't get exactly what I want, but I am firm.
If I am _______, I may tower over you. I do not respect your personal space. I may talk over you, call you names, and/or threaten you if you don't give me what you want. I can present as mean, and not care about your wishes. My main goal is to get what I want, and I will do anything to get it.
Assertive
Aggressive
When life presents with problems, I have four options. What are my options?
1. Solve the problem
2. Feel better about the problem
3. Tolerate the problem
4. Stay miserable.
I am cool, rational, and calculated. Please do not get me distracted from my list of things to do- it really must be done! Don't talk to me if you have a problem you're not willing to solve. I can't process your emotions, so leave your feelings at the door. Who am I?
Reason mind
If I act without thinking, escape or avoid emotions I act _______.
When I am ______, I need to learn how to use my _______ _________ skills.
Hint- what skills do I need to have when something feels uncomfortable and I am feeling stress?
Impulsiveness.
Distress Tolerance Skills.
_____ gets in the way of being mindful. It takes us away from the truth, the story that someone shares with us. It makes us feel awful, we do unkind things, and sometimes think awful things about other people. When we present with ______, we do not get the full story, it clouds our minds/thoughts.
Judgement
Name three of the 10 factors to consider when deciding how firm or intense you want to ask or say no to something.
Capability
Priorities
Self Respect
Rights
Authority
Relationship
Long-short term goals
Give & Take
Homework
Timing
Negotiating does not always work. Sometimes the other person can't meet in the middle. When this happens, how should I look at solving the problem?
I should move into building a positive relationship. If we can't meet in the middle, I should find out more about why/how important the goal is to the other person, using the GIVE acronym.
True or False
I am wired to be purely emotional and/or rational. This is because of our old and new brain don't talk to one another often. By implementing behaviour strategies and incorporating habits, I can build new connections within the brain to help develop a wise mind.
True
** brain is hard wired. When I hear/see something and it becomes a habit, I can get stuck and have difficulty changing/adapting to new things. If I start practicing new skills, I can create change. Working on dialects is a start!