The Family Tree
Uncle Rob asked Mom for a pair of kitchen scissors, she probably didn’t expect him to use them for this unconventional personal grooming task
What is Cutting his toenails?
In what has become a classic moment of gaming confusion, Dad, unable to trigger a certain motion in a Mario game, shouted this unforgettable phrase
What is "I can't yeah!"?
When the Habs finally manage to score, Dad channels his inner French sportscaster and shouts this phrase at the TV
What is "Et le but!"?
It’s not a PIN, a password, or a phone extension, but this number will forever lead you back to Nana and Papa’s old front door.
What is 10550?
Mom meant well, but whenever she sang this old song to Parker, it somehow became the soundtrack to tears instead of smiles
What is "You are my sunshine"?
Dad’s convinced that his nephew is gay and destined for a career in music, reasoning that his name points him toward this brassy instrument
What is a Trumpet?
Though Dad and Parker excel at this game, Sarah’s results make her performance ironically sub-par.
What is Wii Golf?
Whenever Dad draws a blank during Jeopardy, he defaults to this American writer. One fateful night, that guess actually paid off
Who is Edgar Allen Poe?
At the Home restaurant, the best part of dinner wasn’t the food - it was laughing about the toddler menu, open only to those younger than this number
What is 2?
Long before the bagpipes, Parker’s musical ambitions were focused on this four-stringed instrument, though evidence suggests his skills were… evolving
What is the violin?
This cousin consistently avoided silverware at restaurants and always order hand-friendly meals, becoming one of his many quirky qualities
Who is James?
During family Rummoli nights, this unbeatable poker hand is the one everyone hopes will win them the pot
What is a Royal Flush?
When Dad starts a story with this former history teacher’s name, everyone knows a bad joke is about to follow
Who is Mr. Wilkinson?
Counting a first boyfriend, friends who became coworkers, and at least one brutally rough summer, this number sums up the total seasons Sarah spent at kids’ bike camp.
What is 5?
In his early minor hockey days, Parker scored this rare achievement that made the rest of the family very proud
What is a hat trick?
Two elderly women in the family are known for their frequent flatulence, but on one particular occasion, this woman’s rogue fart shocked Sarah, Parker, and maybe even herself
Who is Auntie Marilyn?
In our Mario Kart tournaments, it’s not about who wins, but about avoiding this dreaded position at the bottom of the leaderboard
What is 12th place?
Forget Marimba or Reflection - Dad prefers the theme song from this ’80s crime drama to announce every incoming call
What is Simon and Simon?
When Tiger King was still fresh in memory and quarantine routines were the norm, this was the year our family welcomed a new feline member into their home
What is 2021?
With dedication to homework, projects, and exams, Parker’s academic performance adds up to this number, just shy of perfection
What is 94?
Before she became a chart-topping star, this Canadian musician had a brief job as a babysitter for Dad's brother’s adopted child
Who is Avril Lavigne?
In this mobile card game, one good “hole” can send you from the bottom of the scorecard to the top
What is Play Nine?
Before Teenage Dirtbag made it iconic, Dad made it his own, cruising around in this Chevy model that screams late-’80s cool
What is an Iroc?
How good are everyone's quick math skills? If you combined the years that every family member was born, you would get this number
What is 7,953?
Invented by Parker as a toddler, this made-up term became a repeated word between him and Sarah, occasionally resurfacing in moments of nostalgia
What is Boucala?