Steve Harris
NES video games just hit a new low. <Blank> is a total bore that has sub-standard grpahics and none of the action found in the movie. The hole thing comes off like a bad dream, with hardly any fun to be found. 3/10 (NES)
What is Total Recall? (Acclaim)
I love how 'whole' was spelled.
Most puzzle games aren't memory hogs. The Genesis version is only 1 meg and why Sega couldn't make a nice looking SMS version with 1 meg is beyond me. The playfield is too small and if <blank> can look good, why can't <blank>? Still worth trying if you don't have a Genesis. 6/10 (SMS)
What is Columns? (Sega)
Ed compared it to NES Tetris.
I am not a fan of the show and I was expecting a boring skate around the rink, punch & kicker game but instead you are treated to a variety of back grounds ranging from cities to jungles. Great graphics and sound don't hide the control problems which take away from the game. Only average. 5/10 (NES)
What is Rollergames? (Ultra)
I am no <blank>! This game is for members only and no one sent me a key. I just couldn't get in. This game is worse than the Sunset Strip on a Saturday night. Banging your head into walls is more fun. It's too hard and too complex. 3/10 - NES
That is Wizardy? (Nexoft)
Having just come back from Japan with tons of new carts, <blank> is now playing the 8 meg SuperGrafx Ghouls & Ghosts in between reminiscing about his time with the Game Gear.
Who is Ed Semrad?
<Blank>, while constructed as a decent playing 2 meg game, just doesn't explode off the screen like similar 8-Bit efforts such as <blank> did in four megs. With some tuning this could have been a hit, what we get is a mediocre game that never gets out of first gear. 4/10 (SMS)
What is Super Monaco GP? (Sega)
Steve compared it to Out Run.
A very unusual but challenging game. The jumps are wild but nothing when compared to the end of round bosses which are so huge they extend up to 4 screens high. Very good graphics, multi directional scrolling, and a wide assortment of different scenarios to add variety. 8/10 (NES)
What is Low-G Man? (Taxan)
Interplay is at it again. Looks like Acclaim's new developers are coming up with some real winners: Yeah right! <Blank> is not enjoyable at all. You have no real control of your party and nice graphics and music won't save this <blank> clone with enhanced features. 4/10 (NES)
What is Swords & Serpents? (Acclaim)
Martin compared it to Wizardry.
The licensed puppet adventure TV show storyline is the best part of this game. Not very good or challenging shooter. <Blank> comes off as only being average at best. 5/10 (NES)
What is Thunderbirds? (Activison)
We think we saw our resident arcade expert dropping quarters in Konami's Paradius. When not at the arcade it is rumored that he is playing Shadow of the Ninja.
Who is Sushi-X?
This is a decent follow-up to the first game, <blank> but there really isn't that much to it. Sure it plays like an entirely different game, but the same formula of bonus rounds and a scrolling playfield leave something to be desired. 5/10 (TG16)
What is Devil's Crush? (NEC)
(I liked Devil's Crush more than Alien Crush, so I guess Steve and I disagree.)
A good example of the new generation of Master System 2 games. The spark has gone out of the carts and Sega seems content in bringing out bland versions of great arcade games. Could have been much better. Only Average. 5/10 (SMS)
What is E-Swat? (Sega)
Although they stripped the <blank> title from this game, <blank> is going to be one of those sleeper hits this year. Like <blank>, while the graphics are small in scale this allows more variety in backgrounds and game play. Killer bosses and a jammin' soundtrack are high points. 7/10 (NES)
What is Journey to Silius? (Sunsoft)
Martin says it was stripped of its Terminator license and compares the small graphics to Batman.
I just couldn't get excited about this game. While it is a true simulation, it just isn't fun. The moves are too complex and the time required to be a master is too long. If I want to wear a black belt, I will go to Sears and buy one. Waiting in line to pay for it would be more fun than playing this game. 3/10 (Gen)
What is Budokan? (EA)
<Blank> is completely unbearable! All we hear is his hands-on experience with the Super Famicom. We tolerate him though because he did bring back a Game Gear.
Who is Ed Semrad?
This is a great Game Boy game! <Blank> has a little bit of everything, including scrolling action / adventure, shooting, and much much more! The graphics by Game Boy standards, are superlative, with intermission and bosses! Superb! 8/10 (GB)
What is Batman? (Sunsoft)
A decent puzzle game which has you thinking as if you were playing a chess game. You must look at all the possibilities and guess what will happen when you make each kind of move. Only one move is correct, but which one? 6/10 (NES)
What is Boulder Dash? (JVC)
Another cute fame with puzzle action and addictive game play. <Blank> was elements from the ancient game <blank> and some new techniques. <Blank> ranks with similar games and has more throws in more action to boot! 7/10 (NES)
What is Kickle Cubicle? (Irem)
Martin's "ancient game" is Pengo. His spelling errors and grammar hurt my fingers to retype.
Nothing new here. But it's a solid game with interactive dialog which we've seen before. Good control, fast movements, and fast game play. It has a conventional theme, but it is unique enough to still be worth the trip. 8/10 (NES)
What is Crystalis? (SNK)
When he was last seen, <blank> was just finishing up Phantasy Star 3 for the Sega Mega Drive and counting the days until he gets his copy of Strider for the Genesis.
Who is Martin Alessi?
<Blank> is a game that touches on all the best parts of most hit games and is constructed fairly well. Its problems rest in multiple options that bring more confusion than action. The graphics and sounds are good, but the game is repetitive. 7/10 (Gen)
What is Michael Jackson's Moonwalker? (Sega)
Atari is doing an excellent job in not only getting great titles for their Lynx, but more importantly, they are programming them so that they play well. <Blank> is a great example as it nearly duplicates the "feel" of the arcade version. Awesome sounds! 8/10 (Lynx)
What is Klax? (Atari)
One of the most bizarre shooters I've ever played. Backgrounds are made up of optical illusions that will trick you, attack you, and drive you nuts! I love it! Tough from the beginning to end! <Blank> is one shooter that makes others look to normal. to be interesting. But it's too short. I need more! 8/10 (TG16)
What is Psychosis? (NEC)
Seriously, did anyone proofread Martin's review s before then went to print?
A well made action game for GameBoy! Not as detailed as Chapter 6; not as clever as Chapter 8; not as difficult as Chapter 4; not as colorful as Chapter 9; not as challenging as Chapter 5; but not as expensive as Chapter 21! 7/10 (GB)
What is Wizards & Wor 10? (Acclaim)
CES has left <blank> overloaded with new softs. He's running through them so fast it's hard to tell which he likes best. Mega Man 3 seems to be his favorite.
Who is Steve Harris?