Drunk Elan, The Lost Tapes
In Cancun, Elan thought he was diving into the deep end, unfortunately it was 1 ft of water. For the rest of the trip, Elans signature look included this unlikely vacation accessory.
What is a wheelchair
This two-week girlfriend with legendary bushy eyebrows didn’t trust Elan when he said his uncle was in the hospital… and became a full-time phone detective.
Who is Yael?
The classic Elan starter — fizzy, clear, and deceptively innocent.
What is a tequila soda?
On his birthday in the Hamptons, Elan caused a stir behind the scenes in the bathroom with this unsuspecting staff member.
Who is the Gurney’s waitress?
Elans favorite drink and least favorite life decision often start with the same letter.
What is tequila
The ex who wrote him letters instead of just texting.
Who is the lovestruck neighbor?
This Soho House concoction packs a spicy punch and may explain some of Elan’s wilder stories.
What is Picante?
Elan spends hours crafting fake characters and wild tales on these platforms, confusing friends and fueling group chat chaos.
What are ChatGPT and Sora?
Friends know things are about to go downhill when elan says this three word phrase
How ya doin?!
Known affectionately as a round sweet treat, this girl endured Elan’s unique form of romance — equal parts flirting, roasting, and mild psychological warfare.
Who is Marshmellow
The cozy drink for movie nights, preferably paired with a foot massage.
What is red wine?
At Eleven, Elan tried to enjoy a little VIP treatment upstairs — but got an unexpected Venmo request for $250 from this very persistent “manager.”
Who is her pimp?
Bourbon Street met its match when Elan turned his balcony into a “public performance space.”
What is his run-in with the New orleans PD
A romantic night in the Hamptons went sideways when Elan met this unexpected guest—who greeted him with his fist.
Who is her dad?
The deceptively classy cocktail that looks small but packs a knockout punch — “dry with an orange peel.”
What is a gin martini?
He brought her home thinking he’d sealed the deal — only for Elan to show up, enjoying his sloppy seconds not once, but twice
Who is Brandon Heller?
One New York night, Elan emerged from the subway only to catch a “warm city welcome” from a local stranger.
What is getting unexpectedly decked by a homeless guy?
In college, Elan hid her identity in his phone by going undercover as “Uncle Mike.”
Who is Rachel Gilson?
The snack/drug hybrid that makes Elan forget he even had plans that night.
What are Choccy mushrooms?
Elan’s excuses ranged from being phone-disabled by migraines to a grandma-ash transfer scheme — delivering these tall tales terrified him more than his actual job. His boss?
Who is Jay?