Steps of Emotion Coaching
Help child find words to label their emotion
Step 4
Accept their child's emotions and empathize but fail to give guidance
Laissez-Faire
Physically
Better physical health
Situation #1
When you are pressed for time
Talk slowly, in high-pitched voice, exaggerate facial expressions, and imitation
Infancy
Be aware of the child's emotions
Step 1
Disregard, ignore or trivialize child's negative emotions
Dismissing
Cognitively
Higher academic performance
Situation #2
When you have an audience
Accept child's invitation to play, imitate their emotional reactions, be a safe base
6 months - 12 months
Listen empathetically and validate feelings
Step 3
They are critical of their child's display of negative feelings and may punish them
Dissaproving
Socially
Get along better with friends
Situation #3
When you are too upset/too tired for it to be productive
Allow them to develop autonomy, show respect, provide a community and encourage independent decision making
Adolesence
Recognize the emotion as an opportunity for intimacy/teaching
Step 2
Emotion Coach
Behaviorally
Fewer behavior problems
Situation #4
When you need to address a serious misbehavior
Look at challenges from their perspective and provide them with choices
Toddler years (Ages 1-3)
Set limits and explore possible solutions
Step 5
The style that is best for children
Emotion Coaching
Emotionally
Experience fewer negative feelings and more positive ones
Situation #5
When you child is "faking" an emotion to manipulate you
Encourage fantasy play and one-on-one play with peers, validate desire for acceptance, and don't take criticisms personally
Early to Middle Childhood (Ages 4-12)