Editing
What change, if any, is needed in the sentence?
These crystals are Classified as selenite crystals, meaning they are translucent.
F. Change Classified to classified
G. Delete the comma after crystals
H. Change translucent to transluscent
J. No change is needed.
F. Change Classified to classified
What change should be made in the sentence?
A pet can teach children responsability and encourage families to spend time together.
A. Change can teach to taught
B. Insert a colon after children
C. Change responsability to responsibility
D. Change to spend to spending
C. Change responsability to responsibility
Veronica has not used the most effective word in the sentence. Which word should replace use to create a more effective sentence?
I would recommend a savings account as a first step for everyone—it’s easy to open an account, and if your money is in the bank, you’re less likely to use it on an impulsive purchase
F. waste
G. designate
H. need
J. employ
F. waste
(1) Over the years as scientists studied the mammoths, they uncovered more information that altered their initial theories. (2) This happens often due to new discoveries or additional data that lead to new theories. (3) One initial theory was that the mammoth herd was trapped in a ravine and drowned in a flash flood. (4) Because they are so large, the mammoths likely would have struggled to climb out of the ravine in time. (5) That would have made it hard to survive the sudden flooding. (6) However, as the scientists studied the fossils over several years, researchers discovered that the growth patterns on the bones appeared stunted, as though the animals did not have sufficient nutrition.
What is the most effective way to combine sentences 4 and 5?
Because they are so large, the mammoths likely would have struggled to climb out of the ravine in time to survive the sudden flooding.
When revising sentences should you use the ARMS or CUPS strategy?
ARMS
What change should Jazmin make in the sentence?
Naica is on top of an ancient underground fault, which is a break in the ground where the tektonic plates of Earth have shifted.
A. Delete the comma after fault
B. Change break to brake
C. Change tektonic to tectonic
D. Change have shifted to have shifts
C. Change tektonic to tectonic
What change, if any, should be made in the sentence?
When I learned about the existence of WAF I asked my mother and father if I could support my favorite animal—the elephant.
F. Insert a comma after WAF
G. Change asked to ask
H. Insert a comma after father
J. No change is needed.
F. Insert a comma after WAF
What is the most effective transition to add to the beginning of sentence 12?
Getting a credit card is not easy when you do not have a long work history.
A. In either case
B. Correspondingly
C. To put it differently
D. Unfortunately
D. Unfortunately
(25) Although there are still disagreements about the exact reason why the mammoths died, many people visit the Waco excavation site and develop their own theories about what happened. (26) In the 1990s a climate-controlled shelter was erected over the paleontology site, and in 2015 the site was named “Woolly Mammoth National Monument.” (27) Research is still ongoing, and lucky visitors can see them actively excavating bones and conducting soil tests.
The pronoun in sentence 27 is unclear. Which word or phrase should replace them to create a more effective sentence?
F. woolly mammoths
G. other tourists
H. teenagers
J. Baylor students and scientists
J. Baylor students and scientists
When editing sentences should you use the ARMS or CUPS strategy?
CUPS
What change should be made in the sentence?
In order to learn more about this impressive minerallogical discovery, scientists exploring the caves are working to develop strategies and tools that will help them stay underground longer.
F. Change minerallogical to mineralogical
G. Delete the comma after discovery
H. Change exploring to explore
J. Change them to it
F. Change minerallogical to mineralogical
How does sentence 18 need to be changed?
WAF sends photographs, an Adoption Certificate, cards containing fun facts, and maps depicting the animals’ habitats.
A. Change sends to sending
B. Change Adoption Certificate to adoption certificate
C. Change depicting to depicted
D. Change animals’ to animals
B. Change Adoption Certificate to adoption certificate
The sentence is unclear. How should it be revised?
Having my credit history included on the family credit report, handling my card wisely became very important to me.
F. Having my credit history included on the family credit report encouraged me to handle my card wisely.
G. Because I had my credit history included on the family credit report, it was highly motivating to handle my card wisely.
H. It became a primary goal of mine to handle my card wisely with the family credit report having my credit history included on it.
J. I wanted to handle my card wisely with it including my credit history on the family credit report. 5 Veronica wants to add a call to action to the end of her essay
F. Having my credit history included on the family credit report encouraged me to handle my card wisely.
(26) Lincoln put the same effort he used during casual interactions into preparing for his speeches. (27) He dedicated hours of study and research to his subject matter and practiced his speeches aloud frequently. (28) When Lincoln wrote a speech, he would keep perfecting it until it was exactly how he wanted. (29) He also thought a great deal about the best way to reach his audience. (30) Which story would best convey his message? (31) Lincoln genuinely cared about the people who listened to him speak and believed in inspiring others with hope and good ideas.
The word good is not the most effective word to use in sentence 31. Which word should replace good in the sentence?
A. charming
B. positive
C. necessary
D. appropriate
B. positive
What is the A.R.M.S strategy?
A - Add sentences or words
R - Remove words or sentences that you don't need
M- Move a word or placement of a sentence
S- subtitute words or sentences for new ones
What change should Jazmin make in the sentence?
There are still corners of the world that have not been seen by human eyes, perhaps with surprises just as dazzeling as the Cave of Crystals.
F. Change There are to There’s
G. Change have to has
H. Delete the comma after eyes
J. Change dazzeling to dazzling
J. Change dazzeling to dazzling
What change is needed in sentence 23?
The mission of the World Animal Foundation is to educate others about animals around the globe while directly contributing to rescue and protection programs, I support their efforts.
F. Change mission to missions
G. Change others to them
H. Insert a comma after contributing
J. Change the comma after programs to a semicolon
J. Change the comma after programs to a semicolon
Revise the following sentence. Move the phrases and clauses to create a more effective sentence.
The fish are dead, most of them are, after being dragged around for hours in a crowded net.
Most of the fish are dead after hours of being dragged around in a crowded net.
OR
After hours of being dragged around in a crowded net, most of the fish are dead.
(12) To help shape his platform for president, Lincoln utilized his knowledge of the writings of prominent figures and his developed storytelling skills as well as. (13) When Lincoln visited new places and small towns during the presidential campaign of 1860, some people walked long distances to hear him speak. (14) People would come for miles to have a chance to see and hear him. (15) Lincoln regularly presented debates, arguments, and public speeches in the form of stories. (16) His strategies may have even convinced his political opponents to end up supporting him or working for him. (17) What was Abraham Lincoln’s secret? (18) According to historian and author Doris Kearns Goodwin, “No one could equal” Lincoln’s “never-ending stream of stories.” (19) Goodwin said that Lincoln was a “master storyteller” who “won devoted followers” wherever he went.
What is the most effective revision to make in sentence 12?
A. As well as his knowledge of the writings of prominent figures, Lincoln utilized to help shape his platform for president his developed storytelling skills.
B. Lincoln utilized his knowledge of the writings of prominent figures as well as his developed storytelling skills to help shape his platform for president.
C. To help shape his platform for president, Lincoln as well as utilized his knowledge of the writings of prominent figures and his developed storytelling skills.
D. Lincoln utilized to help shape his platform his knowledge of the writings of prominent figures as well as his developed storytelling skills for president.
B. Lincoln utilized his knowledge of the writings of prominent figures as well as his developed storytelling skills to help shape his platform for president.
What is the CUPS strategy?
C- Capitalization: names, places, months, or titles
U- Usage: nouns and verbs that are correctly used
P- Punctuation: periods, quotes, commas, semicolons...
S- Spelling: check all words, look for homophones, use a dictionary
What is the correct way to write sentences 21 and 22?
(21) If there is a shocking cave like this 980 feet below the surface of Mexico. (22) Then there could be more discoveries just like it in other parts of the world.
A. If there is a shocking cave like this: 980 feet below the surface of Mexico then there could be more discoveries just like it in other parts of the world.
B. If there is a shocking cave like this 980 feet below the surface of Mexico; then there could be more discoveries just like it in other parts of the world.
C. If there is a shocking cave like this 980 feet below the surface of Mexico then there could be more discoveries, just like it, in other parts of the world.
D. If there is a shocking cave like this 980 feet below the surface of Mexico, then there could be more discoveries just like it in other parts of the world.
D. If there is a shocking cave like this 980 feet below the surface of Mexico, then there could be more discoveries just like it in other parts of the world.
What is the most effective way to combine sentences 2 and 3?
(2) I asked my parents to loan me the skateboard money. (3) I said I would pay them back later, but my dad told me no.
A. After asking my parents to loan me the skateboard money, my dad told me no, and I said I would pay them back later.
B. I asked my parents to loan me the skateboard money, saying I would pay them back later, but my dad told me no.
C. I asked my parents to loan me the skateboard money, and I said I would pay them back later and my dad told me no.
D. Although I asked my parents to loan me the skateboard money my dad told me no even though I said I would pay them back later.
B. I asked my parents to loan me the skateboard money, saying I would pay them back later, but my dad told me no.
Over the years as scientists studied the mammoths, they uncovered more information that altered their initial theories. This happens often due to new discoveries or additional data that lead to new theories. One initial theory was that the mammoth herd was trapped in a ravine and drowned in a flash flood. Because they are so large, the mammoths likely would have struggled to climb out of the ravine in time. That would have made it hard to survive the sudden flooding. However, as the scientists studied the fossils over several years, researchers discovered that the growth patterns on the bones appeared stunted, as though the animals did not have sufficient nutrition.
Which sentence in the following paragraph is extraneous and should be deleted from the essay?
A. Sentence 7
B. Sentence 8
C. Sentence 9
D. Sentence 12
B. Sentence 8
(6) Long before he became president, young Lincoln listened to adults tell stories. (7) He was fascinated by the entertaining and humorous tales. (8) He would retell the stories he had heard to his young friends. (9) He simplified the language and expressions so they could understand. (10) These early storytelling experiences showed Lincoln how to engage an audience. (11) As an adult Lincoln was inspired by the works of George Washington and Benjamin Franklin but never forgot his storytelling roots.
What is the most effective way to combine sentences 8 and 9?
He would retell the stories he had heard to his young friends, simplifying the language and expressions so they could understand.
Based on the following question should you use the ARMS or CUPS strategy?
What change should Jazmin make in the sentence?
There are still corners of the world that have not been seen by human eyes, perhaps with surprises just as dazzeling as the Cave of Crystals.
F. Change There are to There’s
G. Change have to has
H. Delete the comma after eyes
J. Change dazzeling to dazzling
CUPS