It Figures
Virtue Ethics
Aristotle
This moral language emphasizes consequences and seeks the best possible outcome.
Utilitarianism
They say tomato you say tomatoe is all well and good. But what if they say human sacrifice and you say life is sacred? This problem for ethics grapples with the changing nature of right and wrong across time and history.
Cultural Relativism
As the trolley careens out of control, Michael Jackson finds himself able to pull the lever and kill the one to save the five, but it turns out he is a nihilist. So what does he do?
My dudes these are sevenfold general things...like that we use to build our laws my dude...
Basic Goods
Utilitarianism
John Stuart Mill
This moral language cares more about developing a particular series of traits rather than achieving a series of outcomes.
Virtue Ethics
This problem for ethics would say that if you drove home drunk and narrowly avoided killing a child you are just as blameworthy as someone who drove home drunk and did kill someone.
Moral Luck
Friedrich Nietzsche could save God from the careening trolley but to do so he must kill several babies on the adjoining track. What does Nietzshce do?
God is dead.
My bro I am not just a bro-a-chute to land you safely in your destination. I AM the destination itself, broheim. Like Kant said you should treat me not as a mere means but...
As an end-in-itself
Deontology
Kant
This moral language derives its name from the Greek word meaning "duty"
Deontology
What is the Euthyphro problem?
Is something right because God commands it or does God command it because it is right?
Eleven and Max from Stranger Things find themselves at the lever as the trolley careens towards five innocent people. On the alternate track, the trolley will travel to a higher elevation and eventually run over Vecna (aka the Mind Flayer). Max puts on her headphones. What is the Trolley doing?
Running Up That Hill
John Stuart Mill more like John Stuart Thrill because the man was ambrodextrous at seeking pleasure and avoiding pain. The brofessor taught us to do the most good for the most people, aka. the....
Principle of Utility
Divine Command Theory
Socrates
Soren Kierkegaard
This moral language will have no trouble with Abraham trying to sacrifice Isaac.
Divine Command Theory
Dramatic as ever, Nietzsche's declared the death of God. He didn't mean God literally died, so what did he mean?
The idea of God has become no longer valid for us in modernity.
Pharrell Williams and Daft Punk believe that the key to the trolley problem is the circumstances that are outside of your control that lead you to the lever in the first place. They want to study this important concept from dusk till dawn. What are they...?
My dude Immanuel was on one when he came up with this. Broseph declared moral commands that apply to all people in all times and all places derived from that reason that all bro people share in common. You might know them as...
Categorical Imperatives
Natural Law Theory
Thomas Aquinas
This moral language holds that our God-given inclinations lead us towards the moral law, without any need for special revelation from God.
Natural Law
This problem for ethics sees the law of causality as making it impossible to praise or blame anyone for their actions.
Determinism
Kanye West stands at the lever as the trolley careens out of control towards five people on track A and could potentially kill one innocent person on track B. He finds suddenly that he cannot choose and thus says.....
No one man should have all that power
Bromigo don't be a brocrastinator. You don't have to wait for a perfect commandment to come down from your breason or figure out what is the most brolicious outcome for all bros everywhere. You just have to work on your self. Avoid deficiency and excess, my dude. Aim for the....
Golden Mean