Assertiveness
What is assertiveness?
Assertiveness means respectfully asking for your needs to be met.
TRUE OR FALSE: Maintaining friendships takes work.
TRUE
TRUE OR FALSE: Good sportsmanship is demonstrated through both words and actions.
TRUE
What are some ways stress can show up in the body? (i.e. how does your body feel when you're stressed?)
Sweaty hands, upset stomach, headache, etc.
What is resilience? (HINT: use the rubber band example)
Like a rubber band, you can become stretched and overwhelmed and get stretched out thin, but when you are resilient you can be flexible and "bounce back" into your original shape.
What is the difference between being assertive, being passive, and being aggressive?
Assertive responses are when someone respectfully asks for their needs to be met.
Passive responses are when someone doesn’t set appropriate boundaries and doesn’t take action to help their needs.
Aggressive behaviors are disrespectful or reactive.
TRUE OR FALSE: You are more likely to get emotionally upset over a problem or challenge if you are able to think of numerous solutions.
FALSE
Can we still be good sports when we are virtually learning, playing, interacting, etc.?
YES!
What happens when your stress levels get too high? (Remember the beaker example!)
We tend to overreact and get overwhelmed. If it gets even higher we can panic, tantrum, or "freak out."
What is self talk?
What we say to ourselves internally.
Give an example of an assertive, passive, and aggressive response to a classmate who made a mean comment about your science project.
Passive: Not say anything and walk away
Aggressive: You can't talk, your project is worse than mine!
Assertive: I feel frustrated when you say mean things about the project I worked so hard on. Please try to be nicer the next time we present projects in class.
Find something else to do instead of playing the game, take turns and play one game first and the other game after, flip a coin, etc.
How can you be a good sport if you win? (e.g. don't brag)
Smile and pay attention to whoever you are playing with. Don't brag or say something hurtful. Thank someone when they congratulate you. Give a compliment back to the person you are playing with. Be flexible and agreeable.
What are some daily things you can do to lessen stress overall? (e.g. get good sleep)
Eat healthy food, exercise, relax, spend time with friends, talk about your stress with an understanding listener, create or build something, draw, write in your journal, etc.
TRUE OR FALSE: Students who are proactive— who aren’t afraid to talk to a teacher or parent and ask for extra help—are more likely to get better grades at school.
TRUE!
Name one tip on how to be assertive.
1. Stay calm
2. Use a firm and appropriate tone of voice
3. Stand with a tall and confident posture
4. Make good eye contact
5. Listen actively when others respond
Name one of the five problem-solving steps we talked about (HINT: IDEAL).
Step 1: Identify the problem
Step 2: Deep breaths, or another calming strategy. Remind yourself that you can work it out!
Step 3: Explore: think of at least three ways to solve the problem
Step 4: Action: discuss the solutions with your friend, agree on one, and act on it
Step 5: Look back: if the solution works, you are done. If not, try another idea.
How can you be a good sport if you aren't doing well? (e.g. don't have a meltdown)
Do not have a meltdown or act unkindly, be happy for your friend, stay calm and continue to play, talk to others in a calm voice, say something nice to the person winning, be cooperative, be flexible and agreeable.
What is something that you can do to help calm down when you are feeling overwhelmed with stress?
Take deep breaths, talk to your parents, positive self-talk, take a break, play with a pet etc.
You just missed a goal in your soccer game. What would a proactive/positive self-talk and a reactive/negative self-talk sound like?
Proactive - "That's okay! I just need to keep practicing and I will make it next time"
Reactive - "I am the worst soccer player in the world. I want to quit"
Your sibling or friend just changed the TV channel without asking! Use the "I-statement" format to tell them how you feel.
“I feel _________________ when you
_____________. Please _________________.”
Pick another member of the group and role-play the below scenario using the 5 steps we discussed in session.
"You want to order pizza for dinner and your friend wants to order sushi. How do you work past this disagreement and come up with a solution that you are both happy with?"
Remember to Identify the problem, take Deep breaths, Explore three possible solutions, discuss with friend and take Action on one, and Look back to see if the solution worked.
Name one time you were a good sport!
Explain a time when your stress beaker was overflowing and what you did to help reduce your stress.
Great job! : )
Name one time you were resilient.
Great job : )