Family Roles
What is the role of a "scapegoat" within a family unit? Anyone in your family that is often in that role?
This family member is frequently blamed for overall family problems or conflict.
Anyone in your family that is often in that role?
What is the silent treatment?
Refusal to communicate, often used to indirectly express anger or punish the other person; rather than discussing/resolving the issue.
What is a trigger?
Something in your environment or an interaction that provokes intense negative feelings.
What is self-soothing or calming techniques at home?
Breathing deeply, counting to 10, playing w/ a fidget toy, taking a break, etc.
What are attachment styles?
Attachment styles are patterns that guide how we connect with others.
They are shaped by early caregiver relationships and later reinforced through peer interactions.
They influence trust, emotional regulation, and relationship behaviors.
What is the role of the "mascot" in a family? Who usually plays that role in your family?
Family member who uses humor or goofiness to distract from serious issues.
Who usually plays that role in your family?
What is assertive communication?
Expressing feelings clearly without blaming or escalating conflict.
What is a consequence of impulsively reacting to a trigger without thinking first?
Strained relationships, unnecessary conflict, intense regret, saying something you don't mean, etc.
Temporarily leaving a conflict is an avoidance strategy that always worsens anger. True/False?
False.
What are the four attachment styles?
Secure, Anxious, Avoidant (dismissive), and Fearful Avoidant (previously known as disorganized).
What is the role of the "hero" in a family? Who usually plays that role in your family?
A family member who appears high functioning and "healthy" who the family can point to as an example of the façade that the family is doing well.
Who usually plays that role in your family?
What is an example of passive-aggressive communication?
Using sarcasm or joking to mask anger or other negative feelings, while avoiding direct communication.
What are family-based triggers?
Family criticism, repeated interruptions, or perceived unfairness.
What is seeking support?
Talking to a trusted adult before reacting in anger
Going to an AA/NA meeting
Attending therapy
Etc.
How do you think attachment impacts family dynamics?
Some behaviors are learned from parents or close family. (Learned not permanent)
Some behaviors are impacted by genetics. (Default blueprint can be edited)
Some behaviors are impacted by life experiences. (We can be changed, and change again)
What is the role of the "Caretaker" in a family? Who usually plays that role in your family?
A family member who attempts to keep everyone in the family happy.
Who usually plays that role in your family?
What is an example of healthy conflict expression?
Explaining one's feelings using “I feel” statements instead of blaming/attacking someone.
Active listening.
What is impulsive responding in the family setting?
Reacting immediately to a family insult or criticism without thinking.
Combining multiple coping strategies in real-life situations strengthens anger management skills. True/False?
True.
What is an example of this?
How do you think attachment styles have impacted you or your life? (If you are not comfortable with answering this, you can phone a friend).
You can't get this one wrong :)
What is the role of the "Lost child" in a family? Who usually plays that role in your family?
The family member who attempts to blend into the background and avoid rocking the boat.
Who usually plays that role in your family?
Name 2 strategies to repair communication after a conflict has escalated.
Apologizing, Active listening, Using “I” statements, Taking a pause, Acknowledging feelings, Reflecting/clarifying, Finding a solution together, Setting boundaries
How does greater self-awareness help a person respond more calmly or appropriately in challenging situations?
Knowing your feelings and triggers helps you stay calm and choose how to respond.
What is a genogram? How can this help with understanding family dynamics?
A visual diagram that maps family structure, relationships, and key patterns (even across multiple generations if you'd like).
Visual aid to understanding dynamics in your central family, friend groups, or social settings. Knowing and understanding your family dynamics can help with healing and growth.
What is secure attachment?
What is anxious attachment?
What is avoidant (dismissive) attachment?
What is avoidant (fearful) attachment?
Secure: Committed yet independent, trust others (w/in reason), communicate openly, and balance reliance on partners with self‑sufficiency,
Anxious: Distrustful, afraid of abandonment, rejection, and conflict. Sensitive to criticism and hungry for approval with strong desire for closeness.
Avoidant (dismissive): Rigid, guarded, distant. Uncomfortable with emotions and has difficulty expressing needs / wants. Avoids conflict.
Avoidant (fearful): Tendency toward emotional extremes with difficulty maintaining healthy boundaries. Conflicting feelings about closeness. Alternates between anxious and avoidant.