Family Roles
The one who is blamed for most problems in the family system.
What is the scapegoat?
Saying “no” without feeling guilty is an example of this.
What is a healthy boundary
A relationship where both people listen and respect each other’s needs.
What is a healthy relationship
This DBT acronym helps you ask for what you need.
You want to say “no” to a friend, but you’re afraid they’ll be mad. What are you trying to protect?
What is the relationship
This person usually takes on the role of achieving to make the family look good.
What is the Hero
If rigid boundaries mean shutting people out, what do we call boundaries where others walk all over you?
What are loose or weak boundaries
In this kind of relationship, one person tries to fix or rescue the other.
What is codependent
When you state how you feel without blaming, it’s called this type of message.
What is an “I statement
You speak up about something unfair at work, even if it risks upsetting your boss. What are you prioritizing?
What is self-respect
This role is often the “comedian” or distractor.
What is the mascot
What kind of boundary violation is someone going through your phone without asking?
What is a physical or privacy boundary
Eye-rolling, sarcasm, and stonewalling are signs of this
What is unhealthy communication or conflict
This type of communication involves saying one thing but acting in a way that shows you're upset or resentful.
What is passive-aggressive communication
You ask your roommate to clean more even though it might cause conflict. What goal are you going for?
What is your objective (getting needs met)
True or False: Roles in a family system are always chosen consciously.
False
Codependency often comes from this kind of early life experience.
What is a chaotic or emotionally unsafe family environment?
One sign of a toxic relationship.
What is lack of boundaries / manipulation / gaslighting
The 3 parts of assertive communication from the workbook
What are “I think, I feel, I need/want
True or False: You always have to choose between getting what you want and keeping the relationship.
What is false
Name 2 ways family roles might show up in your adult relationships.
e.g., being overly responsible, avoiding conflict, rescuing others.
True or False: It’s rude to set boundaries with people you love.
false
Name 3 qualities of a healthy relationship.
Respect, trust, communication, independence, shared values, etc.
A grounding skill to use when emotions hijack a conversation.
What is STOP skill, TIPP, breathing, etc.
Which goal do you think you tend to sacrifice the most: your needs, the relationship, or your self-respect?
Discussion-based answer—no right/wrong.