Boundaries
What is a boundary?
A boundary is a limit that you don't want someone to pass.
True of False - A good friend is trustworthy.
True! A trustworthy friend is someone you can depend on.
A true friend will
A) try to convince you to do something you don't want to do
B) be sensitive to your wants and needs.
B) Be sensitive to your wants and needs - A true friend should make you feel comfortable when you hang out, not make you feel pressured to do things you aren't sure about.
When you make a mistake, you should honestly admit to having done it and apologize for it, if necessary. True or False and Why
True - If you do then people will know you take responsibility for your actions, and they will then trust you more because you're honest and show that you learn from your mistakes.
What's something in your control when it comes to your friends?
Your words
Your feelings
Your actions
When do you want to set a boundary?
You can set a boundary when someone is being unkind or disrespectful of you.
Thoughtfulness requires that you are:
A. an active listener
B. Only thinking about yourself
An active listener! You must pay attention to what other people have to say in order to be thoughtful towards them later on.
True or False: When we feel like we can't trust somebody, we sometimes can't believe what they say.
True! Always tell the truth, even if it's hard.
When first becoming friends with someone, you should share
A) your likes and dislikes or
B) your deepest, darkest secrets.
A) Your likes, dislikes, goals, etc. - Even friends shouldn't normally know private information that doesn't effect them, but they should be able to get to know your personality and passions.
Best practice when dealing with a conflict is to start by saying this:
I feel_____ because ________. I would like
What is a good friend?
A good friend is kind, helpful, honest, and lets you be yourself!
In order to have a good friend, you must be a
____ friend.
good
How can you tell if someone is a good friend?
He or she is trustworthy, compromises, and always wants to do what is best for you.
Which of these is an example of being a bad friend?
A) Including everyone in your games
B) Setting a boundary
C) Telling a friend bad things about another person so that they will like you better than the other person.
C) Telling a friend bad things about someone so that they will like you better than the other person.
Difference between drama vs. conflicts
Drama = making a big deal out of nothing
Conflict: Some type of disagreement with your friend.
True or False - Is setting a boundary mean?
False! Setting a boundary is not mean and allows others to know how you want to be treated.
True or False - Compromise is never a good solution. Only think about yourself.
False - Sometimes it is okay for both people to get some of what they want in order for them to get along. Compromise isn't a good solution if it means letting someone violate your boundaries.
Give me 2 examples of what respect means in a friendship
Resisting the temptation to talk about your friend behind her back; trusting that her intentions are good; being happy for her even when you're really jealous; believing the words that are coming out of her mouth.
True or False: If you have a hobby that you really enjoy doing, you can probably guess that there are others out there who feel the same, and you could potentially start a friendship.
True! Sharing the same interests is a great way to start a friendship.
How can triangulation cause hurt feelings?
Given an example of a boundary setting you could say for a friend
I don't like when you gossip about my friend
What are the 'magic words' that are a very important part of taking responsibility for making a mistake?
I'm sorry!
If someone tells you something juicy about someone else, how can you tell the difference between just regular friend talk and gossip?
Some examples are:
- Are you talking about something another person considers private?
- Are you saying things to make the other person feel hurt you did?
- Would you totally change what you're saying if the person you're talking about was standing right behind you?
-Is this just feeding a drama?
When you get a gift or present for a friend, why is it important to give them something that is related to their likes or interests and not just yours?
In a nutshell, because that way you show that you were really thinking about them and paid attention to what they said they like.
These are chemical changes that happen inside your body during middle school which result in intense emotions and mood swings.
Puberty