Control & Acceptance
Which of these situations IS under your personal control?
A) How your sports team performs
B) Other people's opinions about you
C) How you decide to respond and what tools you use today
D) The initial reaction of your nerves
C) How you decide to respond and what tools you use today
What is the difference between "hearing" someone and "active listening"?
Hearing is just receiving sound waves, while active listening means giving your full attention, seeking to understand their perspective, and reflecting back what you heard without immediately planning your response.
True or False: It is impossible to have a valuable life or enjoy joyful moments while physical pain exists.
False. (We can build valuable moments by adapting activities to our current capacities)
What is the strategy of doing things little by little with planned breaks, instead of doing everything all at once called?
A) Rumination
B) Pacing (Dosification of rhythm)
C) Pushing to the limit
D) Laziness
B) Pacing (Dosification of rhythm). (Breaking down tasks and taking planned pauses BEFORE pain increases).
You are at the supermarket and severe pain starts halfway through shopping. What is the most appropriate response using your tools?
A) Take a pause, breathe, and decide whether to ask for help or leave something for later.
B) Rush to finish everything fast no matter the pain.
C) Get mad at yourself for not enduring like before.
D) Leave the cart abandoned and walk out.
A) Take a pause, breathe, and decide whether to ask for help or leave something for later.
You are at a family gathering and a pain flare starts. Which response demonstrates focusing your energy on what you DO control?
A) Enduring it in silence
B) Taking a pause, breathing, and deciding to sit down and rest
C) Leaving without saying anything
B) Taking a pause, breathing, and deciding to sit down and rest
A family member says to you with frustration, "You never want to go out or do anything!". How would you respond using an "I" statement?
(Answers may vary). The key: Taking responsibility for your own emotions (using "I" statements) and expressing a clear need without attacking the other person.
(Ex: "I feel overwhelmed when there's a lot of pressure. I would love to join you, but today my body needs rest.")
What is the difference between a personal "Goal" and a "Value"?
A goal is completed or achieved (e.g., finishing paying off a debt); a value is a continuous guide (e.g., honesty, family, economic stability).
You wake up one day with very little pain and a lot of energy. Which of these decisions helps you take care of your body to avoid a severe flare-up the next day?
A) Clean the whole house in one go to make the most of the day!
B) Do tasks at a steady pace with pauses, saving energy but you may not finish cleaning.
C) Do triple the exercise to make up for lost time.
D) Endure the pain if it starts, without stopping until everything is done.
B) Do tasks at a steady pace with pauses, saving energy EVEN if you wont finish the task.
(Prevents the overexertion-collapse cycle)
You realize you've been telling yourself all morning: "You're useless for not finishing this." What practical step should you take at that moment?
A) Ignore it and work harder. "You got this!"
B) Complain to others about your lack of productivity.
C) Pause, recognize the critical voice, and change the phrase to one you would say to a good friend.
D) Try to do it next week, there's time!
C) Pause, recognize the critical voice, and change the phrase to one you would say to a good friend.
True or False: "Acceptance" in chronic pain management means giving up, surrendering, or resigning yourself to suffering.
False. It means stopping the fight against what cannot be changed right now so you can focus on what matters to you right now
During a conversation with a loved one about your pain, they seem distracted or dismissive. What is an effective communication tool you can use to address this without starting an argument?
Express your need clearly and calmly using a "soft startup" (e.g., "I really need to share something important about how I'm feeling today, and I'd appreciate a few minutes of your focused attention").
Your core value is "being a good family member/friend," but pain today doesn't allow you to leave the house. How can you practically honor that value from home?
(Examples): Making a phone call, sending an affectionate message, listening to someone, or sharing a quiet tea/board game.
What main signal are you sending your body when your exhales are slower than your inhales
A) That we should be alert since were possibly in danger. RED ALERT RED ALERT!!
B) That we are likely safe and its appropriate for our body to relax
C) That are blood pressure it high
D) That it needs to shut down completely
B) That it is safe to relax, calm down, and there is not alert or danger to worry about. (Explanation: Activates the parasympathetic nervous system, which acts as the "emergency brake" to reduce physical stress and muscle tension).
A friend or family member asks you for help moving heavy boxes, but you know doing so will cause a severe pain flare. How do you respond assertively?
A) Do it anyway so as not to make them feel bad.
B) Say yes, but make note of what an inconsiderate or needy person they're, for next time they ask you have ammo!
C) Kindly tell them you cannot lift heavy weights for health reasons and offer a lighter alternative.
D) Make up an excuse and stop answering their messages so they learn! Thats not a real friend!
C) Kindly tell them you cannot lift heavy weights for health reasons and offer a lighter alternative.
Spending hours in your mind thinking: "Why me?", "This is never going to change" is known as rumination. What effect does it have on the body?
Increases: frustration, burden, muscle tension, and pain sensitivity (through the activation of the nervous system).
What is a "Healthy Boundary" and why is it necessary when managing pain?
It is a clear rule or limit to protect your time, energy, and body.
Why does putting our life on "pause" until the pain completely disappears usually stall our improvement?
(Answers may vary). THE KEY: Because it isolates us from activities that give us satisfaction, which increases sadness and stress. Without resources, help, or intentional learning, we are less likely to change our behavior or perspective.
ou are feeling a lot of physical tension or emotional overload during the day. Which of the following is a quick grounding technique you can do in under 1 minute?
A) Mentally review everything you still have to do.
B) Lie down to sleep for the rest of the day.
C) Hold your breath until the discomfort passes.
D) Feel your feet firm on the floor, drop your shoulders, and take a deep breath.
D) Feel your feet firm on the floor, drop your shoulders, and take a deep breath.
ou are trying to rest on the couch, but you feel guilty for not being "productive." What reframing thought helps you release that guilt?
A) "I'm a lazy person for not working."
B) "Rest is an active part of my treatment and health, not a prize I have to earn."
C) "I will get up and work even if the pain is unbearable."
D) "I must feel guilty until I finish all my pending tasks."
B) "Rest is an active part of my treatment and health, not a prize I have to earn."
You have had high pain for several days. What is an example of how to self-validate and support yourself INSTEAD of self-criticizing, insulting yourself, or giving up?
(Answers may vary, but the KEY IS:) Replacing self-criticism, insults, or giving up with words of understanding, validation of effort, and personal support.
(Ex: "Having a tough day doesn't erase my progress. My body needs rest today, and I am doing the best I can.")
You are invited to a 4-hour event, but you know your current sitting limit is 1 hour. Which response reflects a healthy boundary?
(Answers may vary). The key: Communicating the limit clearly and respectfully (even if it generates discomfort) and sticking to it.
(Ex: "I'd love to go and keep you company for a bit. I'll stay for the first hour and then I'll head back to rest.")
Name 3 personal values that DO NOT depend on being free of physical pain to be practiced.
THERE ARE MANY! (Ex: Kindness, patience, learning, creativity, faith, gratitude, empathy, etc.)
Mention at least 3 pillars of daily self-care CRUCIAL for helping the nervous system recover from constant pain.
(Answers may vary).
The key: Rest, pacing, restorative sleep/sleep hygiene, gentle movement/exercise, scheduling restorative activities, practicing emotional regulation, compassionate self-talk, or clear boundaries.
During a medical appointment you feel the doctor is not taking your pain into account or truly listening. What is the best strategy to advocate for yourself effectively?
C) Bring written notes of your daily limitations and communicate them calmly and firmly, or ask the Dr. to reconsider your request.