DENOMINATIONS & BASICS
if you're not right with god, you'll go here when you die
HELL
These two had their first date in the Garden of Eden
adam and eve
This denomination has the most snake charmers
Pentecostalism
they're vegetables.
veggie tales
This rite involving bread and wine has many names.
i'm going for communion, but eucharist, Lord's Supper, Blessed Sacrament, or some variation are fine too
he died on the cross for your sins and will one day return to bring the souls of the righteous back with him to heaven. he is the LORD and SAVIOR and if you welcome him into your heart you may or may not be born again
jesus christ
The final book of the bible explains how this event will go down
The RAPTURE
people keep putting this verse on signs at like WWE events and i don't know why. but if you're not christian you've probably seen this verse somewhere, if only abbreviated
John 3:16, for he so loved the world that he gave his only begotten son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life
name like 3 protestant denominations that aren't just 'evangelical'
.
me when i kill a giant with a rock (NOT my brother)
david and/or goliath
this type of gospel preaches that good things will come to those who believe hard enough (and especially those who tithe)
Prosperity Gospel
Nicolas Cage was in this fundamentalist end-times-themed movie based on a book series of the same name
LEFT BEHIND (2014)
These two major sects of Christianity disagree on whether the Pope is cool or not, and usually also whether purgatory exists
PROTESTANTISM and CATHOLICISM
the one where god tells abraham to kill his son and then cancels his doordash order last second
the binding of isaac
this prosperity gospel televangelist has had. so many plastic surgeries and he STILL looks like a broccoli
joel osteen
these guys basically invented the phrase 'GOD HATES F_GS'
westboro baptist church
Jesus Christ
This little boy WASN'T eaten by lions
Daniel
if you can guess literally any 3 consecutive words of the pledge of allegiance to the bible OR the pledge of allegiance to the christian flag without looking them up (YES THESE ARE REAL) i'll venmo you $1 as reparations
I pledge allegiance to the Bible, God’s Holy Word,
I will make it a lamp unto my feet
and a light unto my path,
and I will hide its words in my heart
that I might not sin against God"
OR
I pledge allegiance
to the Christian Flag
and to the Savior for whose
Kingdom it stands.
One Savior, crucified, risen,
and coming again
with life and liberty to all
who believe.
me when i'm waking up to ash and dust and also mormonism???
IMAGINE DRAGONS....