Smash
Blue Iron Man who’s really into interpretive dance and absolutely hates daylight savings time.
Dark Samus
Telekinetic baseball prodigy who wandered out of a 90s time capsule and solves cosmic horror with snack food and friendship. Never says a word, but somehow always knows your secrets.
Ness
A plumber with the reflexes of a caffeinated squirrel, who spends his days jumping on turtles, breaking bricks, and somehow never getting a back injury from carrying around so many mushrooms.
Mario
Giant evil man with a lot of shoulder armor and an obsession with darkness, power, and an unusually expensive wardrobe. Has a laugh that sounds like he’s the villain in a 90s cartoon, but with zero charisma.
Ganondorf
Tall, green-clad brother who's always in the shadow of his more famous sibling, but somehow ends up saving the day by accident. Terrified of ghosts, but still somehow ends up hunting them in a vacuum.
Luigi
Tiny space dad who crash-lands once a week and makes unpaid plant interns do all his chores while he supervises like a confused garden gnome.
Olimar.
Silent real estate tycoon with dead eyes and the upper body strength to uproot trees in one yank. Smiles like they’ve definitely buried something behind your house.
Villager
Genetically engineered psychic catfish who broods like a moody teenager, but with the power to throw you into orbit just by thinking about it. Has a lot of unresolved issues with their creator and a serious attitude problem.
Mewtwo
Two sword-wielding sunbeam sisters with personalities so different, you'd swear they were from two completely different games. One’s fiery and the other’s... well, also fiery but with more sass and less patience.
Pyra/Mythra
A kid with a hat and an army of animals that they absolutely refuse to let rest. Spends more time shouting at their creatures than actually forming a personality. Could probably use a nap.
Pokemon Trainer
Angry fire-breathing turtle-dinosaur who kidnaps royalty as a full-time hobby and somehow keeps losing to an Italian plumber with a jumping addiction.
Bowser
Ninja with a mysteriously sparkly wardrobe who’s always lurking in the shadows, waiting to throw daggers and confuse you with their identity. Also, probably has a degree in parkour.
Sheik
A sword-wielding amnesiac with a green hat collection and a constant need to rescue someone else’s kingdom. Probably hasn’t had a proper meal in years, but hey, at least he can talk to horses.
Link
A tiny, hyperactive monkey who thinks wearing a hat makes him a professional, yet spends most of his time swinging around and throwing bananas like they’re grenades. Basically, the energetic sidekick you didn’t ask for.
Diddy Kong
A squid kid who thinks they’re too cool for school, covered in ink and constantly splatting their way through life. Not really sure what they’re trying to do, but it definitely involves a lot of dancing and spraying everything in sight.
Inkling
Sentient garlic clove with a biker jacket and the moral compass of a raccoon in a dumpster fight. Definitely hasn't washed his hands since 1999.
Wario.
High-heeled sorceress with a passion for long-winded monologues and kicking people in the face while somehow making it look like a fashion statement. Also, her hair doubles as a weapon, because why not?
Bayonetta
Quiet, punch-obsessed martial artist who spends more time meditating and shouting at the air than making friends. Might be on a lifelong quest to find the world’s most intense fist bump.
Ryu
A pink puffball with an appetite for literally everything, including enemies, planets, and your personal space. Has the power to copy abilities but still somehow manages to be the most innocent thing in the room.
Kirby
A princess who acts like she’s too good for the crown, but still spends her time playing sports and throwing parties. Has way too much energy for anyone’s good and somehow always ends up in the most random situations.
Daisy
Edgy angel clone who thinks wearing black makes him deep.
Dark Pit
Goddess who spends more time playing celestial matchmaker than actually running a kingdom. Too busy giving out advice like she's hosting a talk show to notice the chaos she's casually enabling.
Palutena
Blond-haired firecracker who’s somehow both Ryu’s best friend and his loud, overly confident rival. Wears a gi like it’s a fashion statement and insists on showing off his perfect hair mid-fight.
Ken
A silent, sword-wielding teacher who spends more time staring at students than actually teaching. Somehow manages to lead an army, win hearts, and still never say more than 10 words in a conversation.
Byleth
A half-dragon with a wardrobe that screams "I'm not quite sure what I am yet." Spends most of their time trying to make everyone get along while also occasionally turning into a massive dragon to solve problems... for some reason.
Corrin