Seek First to Understand
Then to be Understood
5 Poor Listening Styles
Genuine Listening
Baby Steps
100
Before I can ____ in another's _____, I must first remove my own.
walk, shoes
100
Listen, or thy ______ will make thee ____.
tongue, deaf
100
As a team: Act out an example of SPACING OUT
(Spacing out is when someone is talking to us but we ignore them because our mind is wandering off in another galaxy. They may have something very important to say, but we're caught up in our own thoughts.)
100
The first step in genuine listening is ______ ____ ____ ____, _____, ___ ____.
listen with your eyes, heart, and ears.
100
See how long you can keep ___ _______ with someone while they are talking to you.
eye contact
200
You've been taking classes on how to read, write, and speak better, but when have you ever taken a class on how to ______ better?
listen
200
The deepest need of the human heart is __ __ __________.
to be understood
200
As a Team: Act out an example of PRETEND LISTENING
(Pretend listening is more common. We still aren't paying much attention to the other person, but at least we pretend we are making insightful comments at key junctures, such as "yeah," "uh-huh," "cool," "sounds great.")
200
The second step of genuine listening is _____ __ _____ _____.
stand in their shoes
200
Sometime this week, ask your mom or dad, "____ __ _____?" Open up your heart and practice genuine listening. You'll be surprised by what you learn.
How's it going?
300
You have ___ ____ and ___ _____...Hel-lo!
two ears, one mouth
300
What was the name of the eating disorder of the young college girl who didn't ever want to eat.
anorexia
300
As a Team: Act out SELECTIVE LISTENING
(Selective listening is where we pay attention only to the part of the conversation that interests us.)
300
The third step of genuine listening is ________ _________.
practice mirroring
300
The next time you find yourself wanting to bury your feelings deep inside you, don't do it. Instead, ________ ____ __ _ ___________ ___.
express them in a responsible way
400
Listening with just your ears isn't good enough, because only 7% of communication is contained in the words we use. The rest comes from ____ ________ (53%) and how we say the words (40%).
body language
400
Death is people's number 2 fear. What is their number 1 fear?
speaking in public
400
As a Team: Act out WORD LISTENING
(Word listening occurs when we actually pay attention to what someone is saying, but we listen only to the words, not to the body language, the feelings, or the true meaning behind the words.)
400
Give an example of a difference between mimicking and mirroring
repeating words vs repeating meaning / using the same words vs using your own words / cold and indifferent vs warm and caring
400
The poor listening style I struggle with most: _______________________________________________
(Answers will vary, but team has to have an answer written down)
500
What 3 things should we stay away from when listening to someone? ____ing, _____ing, and ____ing.
judging, advising, and probing
500
Name 3 ways parents are real people, to whom you should try listening, just like you would a friend.
(answers will vary)
500
As a team: Act out SELF-CENTERED LISTENING
(Self-centered listening happens when we see everything from our own point of view. Instead of standing in another's shoes, we want them to stand in ours. This is where sentences like "Oh, I know exactly how you feel" come from.)
500
Name three phrases you could use to begin to "mirror" someone
"As I get it, you felt that..." "So, as I see it ..." "I can see that you're feeling..." "You feel that..." "So, what you're saying is..."
500
Think of a situation where your constructive feedback would really help another person. Share it with them when the time is right. Person who could benefit from my feedback: ________________________________________
(Answers will vary, but team must have something written down.)
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