Things Money Can't Buy
According to Harvard's 85-year happiness study, this is the single greatest predictor of a long, happy life.
What are relationships?
TRUE or FALSE: Loneliness is the same as being alone.
What is FALSE?
Researchers found that THIS simple act — done with a stranger on public transit — increased happiness, contrary to participants' predictions.
What is talking to a stranger?
We systematically underestimate how positive social interactions with strangers will be.
Research shows that using THIS simple element of conversation — which costs nothing and takes seconds — immediately increases perceived warmth and connection.
What is using someone's name?
Gallup's global research found that employees who have THIS at work — a single person they'd call a close friend — are seven times more likely to be engaged in their jobs.
What is a best friend at work?
Research shows people consistently underestimate the happiness boost from this free daily activity — while overestimating the boost from shopping.
What is savoring a small pleasure (coffee, a walk, a conversation)?
This common advice — 'just put yourself out there' — fails because loneliness actually impairs this brain function, making social situations feel threatening.
What is threat perception (hypervigilance to social threat)?
John Cacioppo's neuroscience research shows lonely brains literally scan for danger. 'Just try harder' ignores the biology.
This percentage of our happiness is estimated to be within our intentional control — neither genetic set point nor circumstances.
What is approximately 40%?
Sonja Lyubomirsky's happiness pie chart: 50% set point (genetic), 10% circumstances, 40% intentional activity. We have more agency than we think.
This specific type of question — as opposed to surface questions like 'what do you do?' — has been shown to accelerate intimacy and connection dramatically.
What are deep (or meaningful / self-disclosing) questions?
Research shows that teams where members know THIS about each other — not work skills, but personal details — consistently outperform teams that don't.
What is personal facts / personal stories about each other?
Studies show earning above this annual household income (US) provides almost no additional happiness boost.
What is approximately $75,000–$100,000 per year?
Researchers found that having MORE friends on social media is associated with THIS outcome — surprising many who assumed more connections = less loneliness.
What is greater loneliness (or no reduction in loneliness)?
This practice — writing three specific things you're grateful for before bed — has been shown to increase happiness scores by this percentage in peer-reviewed trials.
What is approximately 25%?
When someone shares good news with you, THIS style of responding — instead of passive acknowledgment — is most associated with relationship satisfaction.
What is active constructive responding (asking follow-up questions, showing enthusiasm)?
This workplace behavior — once considered a sign of weakness — is now shown by research to be the most effective way to build trust on a team in the shortest time.
What is admitting a mistake or showing vulnerability?
This paradox describes why lottery winners return to their baseline happiness level within one year of winning.
What is hedonic adaptation (or the hedonic treadmill)? Hedonic relates to pleasure, enjoyment, and the avoidance of pain. Derived from the Greek word hedone (meaning pleasure)
This group — which most people assume would be the loneliest — actually reports lower loneliness rates than adults aged 18–34, according to a 2019 US survey.
What are adults aged 72 and over (seniors)?
Gen Z is the loneliest generation on record. Social media, remote work, and declining in-person community have hit young people hardest.
Yes, a 25 year old, lonelier than Bonnie from bingo night.
This surprising finding from happiness research shows that people who do THIS while commuting — instead of sitting in silence — report higher wellbeing despite expecting the opposite.
What is talking to fellow commuters?
Studies show that this specific micro-behavior — lasting only 1–2 seconds — when added to a normal conversation, significantly increases feelings of being seen and understood.
What is eye contact (sustained eye contact)?
Studies on remote and hybrid work found that THIS specific thing — not free snacks, not ping pong tables — most predicts whether remote workers feel connected to their teams.
What is informal social interaction (watercooler moments, casual check-ins, non-work conversation)?
This form of spending money — NOT on yourself — is the only type consistently shown to increase happiness across 136 countries studied.
What is prosocial spending (spending on others / giving)?
The U.S. Surgeon General's 2023 loneliness advisory compared the mortality risk of loneliness to this many cigarettes per day.
What is 15 cigarettes per day?
The WHO Commission on Social Connection published a landmark report establishing that loneliness and social isolation are linked to an estimated more than 871,000 deaths annually globally
This counterintuitive finding, called the 'arrival fallacy,' explains why achieving a major goal — a promotion, a degree, a marriage — often produces this unexpected emotion.
What is emptiness, flatness, or the feeling of 'is this all there is?'
Researchers found that THIS act — surprisingly brief at just 2 minutes — if done before a high-stakes social situation, measurably increases confidence and social connection.
What is a power pose (or expansive body posture / Amy Cuddy's research)?
A landmark study found that THIS specific management behavior — taking just 5 minutes to do THIS weekly — increased employee well-being scores by 45% within one quarter.
What is asking a genuine question about an employee's life outside work (and actually listening)?