Triggers
What are triggers (definition)?
Something that provokes an UNWANTED emotion or behavior response.
What are the 3 different types of boundaries?
Healthy, rigid, porous
What is consent? (Definition)
Voluntarily agreeing to something
Define what red flags are
A pattern or downward spiral of behaviors.
Define green flags
Good traits of a person
What is an example of an emotional trigger?
feeling judged, being ignored, feeling overwhelmed, financial stress, feeling unsafe, etc.
What are some characteristics of healthy boundaries?
Selective of who to let in and keep out.
Takes time to build trust.
Able to say "no" when needed
Communicates assertively
ETC
Can you withdraw consent at any time?
YES. You can withdraw consent at any time.
Fill in this Red Flag blank:
Listen to the "whispers" before they become.........?
What are Screams?
Could your values influence the type of person you let in?
Yes, absolutely.
What are some examples of physical triggers?
Loud noises, physical touch, fatigue, crowded spaces, smells, etc.
What are some characteristics of rigid boundaries?
Keeps most people at a distance
very untrusting
very guarded w/ personal info
Detached from others
Communicates aggressively
If someone says "Maybe", does that mean convince me?
NO. It means they are unsure. So respect their decision.
What are some ways of dealing with red flag or (Danger) people?
Setting and maintaining firm boundaries.
Block them.
Ending the relationship.
What are some examples of green flags?
Philanthropist, treats people kindly, cares about others, listens to you talk, provides comfort and safe space, etc.
This skill can help you focus on the present moment while making you feel relaxed.
Grounding Techniques, mindfulness
What are characteristics of porous boundaries?
Lets almost anyone get close to them
Overly trusting of others
Overshares
Overly involved in others problems
Communicates passively
If I tell someone yes and agree beforehand, but then when it comes down to it I say no. Am I obligated to still do something?
NO! You can change your mind at anytime.
What are some questions to ask yourself if somone is a healthy or supportive person/match?
Is my relationship the only important one in my life?
Does this person lift me up or bring me down?
Do you feel good about yourself when you are with this person or after the fact?
Can you both accept changes in your roles and feelings within the relationship?
If someone constantly shows green flags, are there possible hidden red flags?
Yes, possibility.
What are some ways that you can support others when they are being triggered?
Provide empathy, be present, listen & allow space, etc
What are ways to implementing your boundaries?
Communicating them assertively.
using them consistently
Saying "no", and sticking to it.
Joel goes to a party with his friends. Joel is excited and antsy about going to this party because Nancy is going to be there. Joel drinks a 3 beers before going up to Nancy. They start chatting with one another, and end up sneaking off to Nancy's car. While in the car, things start to escalate and they engage in sexual activity. Joel makes sure this is something Nancy wants to do. She agrees and says yes.
Are they both consenting?
NO! Joel is intoxicated. If you are under the influence, you cannot give consent.
Identify different manipulation tactics
Gaslighting
Blackmailing
Coercion
Silent Treatment
What are some examples of Green Flags or signs of Safety?
applying healthy coping skills learns
active coping
staying physically active/healthy
spending time with supportive people who are "clean"