Feelings
True or False: Some feelings are just not okay.
False! All feelings are normal, allowed and necessary! It's how we express them that can be a problem sometimes.
Your friend chose to sit with someone else at lunch, leaving you feeling REJECTED. What need of yours was NOT being met?
a) excitement
b) creativity
c) belonging
c) belonging - When we are feeling rejected, it may be because we have a need for belonging that is NOT being met.
True or False: Paying close attention to our body sensations and what they mean for us can help us understand ourselves and our emotions.
True! Our body gives us signs all day long of what we are feeling and what we are needing. We just have to learn to pay attenion!
What is the first step in the STOPP strategy that we learned for calming ourselves down when feeling big negative feelings?
STOP - Imagine a big red stop sign and freeze like a statue!
Amy was red in the face, kicking the ground and yelling at teammates after missing a goal in soccer. She looked very angry. If we think about the anger iceberg, what might she have been feeling underneath her anger?
Embarassed, disappointed
Your parent hears your sibling crying and comes into the room upset with you because they think you did something to make them cry. You try to explain, but they don't give you a chance. You are feeling hurt. What need is not being met?
a) creativity
b) movement
c) understanding
In this scenario, you might be feeling hurt because you have a need for understanding that is not being met. And not being able to explain what happened (your sibling bumped their head on a table) left you feeling hurt and misunderstood.
True or False: If you notice that your heart is racing very fast, your face is hot and your muscles are tense, that means that your thinking brain is online and you are ready to make a choice you will feel good about.
False- Tense muscles, racing heart and a hot face are all signs that you are in "fight or flight" and that your thinking brain is offline. It's time to use a body calming strategy to bring your thinking brain back!
There is scientific research to prove that this easy to use strategy (always available to us) can slow our heart rate to normal, ease tension in our bodies and help move us out of "fight or flight."
Deep breathing with long exhales can bring our body to a calmer state, including slowing our heart rate, loosening muscles and slowing our breathing.
You notice a friend sitting with their body folded over on their desk and head down, what might that friend be feeling?
Sad, rejected, worried, lonely
Your friend's pet gerbil died over the weekend. You notice them looking sad. What is a need they may be experiencing?
a) Order
b) support and compassion
c) excitement
They are probably experiencing a need for support or compassion. Letting them know that you are sorry for their loss and open to listening may help.
What do people usually mean when they say they have "butterflies in their stomach" What are they probably feeling?
Nervous, scared, worried
If we are feeling very low energy and a little bored, what is a strategy we can use to energize ourselves and get ready for learning or activities?
Take a movement break -- anything that gets our blood pumping and our muscles engaged can change our body energy and help us shift to a higher energy activity.
A student had a very big reaction when the teacher listed homework assignments. He looked very angry. If we think about the "Anger iceberg" we learned about, what might he have been feeling underneath the surface?
Overwhelmed, Worried, Disappointed
Over the break, Annie got together with friends to play in their new rock band. They write the songs and learn how to play them. Annie noticed that she was feeling really happy as they played and sang together. They actually sounded great. What needs were being met as Annie played?
a) creativity
b) belonging
c) success
d) all of the above
All of the above. We can have several different needs met at the same time! When we have many needs being met, it usually feels pretty good! We can use that information to look for other things that help us feel good!
You are about to present your passion project to your class and to class parents. As the time approaches, you notice that your stomach is feeling a little wobbly, your heart is beating a little fast and your legs are like spaghetti. This probably means that:
1. Your presentation is going to be a flop so you better go home
2. You should go to the nurse to have your temperature taken.
3. You are probably having some nervous feelings about your presentation. It might help to take some time to slow down your breathing and
True or False: Putting a timer on for five minutes and coloring or listening to music can help our body calm down when we are upset.
True!
Fill in the blank:
Feelings tell us what we _________________.
Need! Our feelings are messengers that give us important clues to what we are needing!
True or False: Having fun is an important human need.
Yes! Having fun is a basic need we all have. It brings us joy, satisfaction and happiness! It can also help us to find our creativity!
Your muscles are tense, your face it hot, you feel like you might explode after a disagreement with a friend? Is this a good time to have a conversation with a friend about what just happened? Explain why or why not.
When our body is in this state (tight muscles, hot face, pounding heart), it is a sign that we need to calm our bodies and take care of ourselves before having any kind of conversation. We need to get ourselves back to the calm zone -- and thinking zone!
What are the five steps of the STOPP skill?
Stop
Take a Breath
Observe
Pull Back
Plan a Response