Boundaries
Name two examples of healthy boundaries you can have for yourself.
Saying "no" without feeling guilty; maintaining individual interests; dedicating time to spend with your friends; expressing your needs while respecting theirs
One partner feels that he/she "can't live without" the other. He/She threatens to do something drastic if the relationship ends.
Red Flag
Conflict and fighting are the same thing.
False.
Bonus points if your team can describe the difference between conflict and fighting.
You meet someone you would like to be friends with and ask for their phone number. They decline your request and you respond by saying, "Oh, come on. I just want to be friends. What's wrong with that?"
Is that an acceptable response, or is that a boundary violation?
Boundary violation.
Dismissing their decline demonstrates a lack of respect for the other person's personal space and decision-making.
Your partner constantly checks in on you by asking where you are going and/or who you are with and is quick to anger when you don't promptly respond to their texts or phone calls.
Red Flag.
Can you imagine what relationships were like before social media and telephones existed?
In a healthy relationship, you have to be honest and nothing can be kept private because there are no secrets in a healthy relationship.
False.
In a healthy relationship, honesty and boundaries are not the same. You can keep things private and still be honest. You are allowed to have privacy. You do not need to sacrifice privacy to have honesty.
What can you do if your friend/partner disrespects your boundaries?
Ask them to correct their behavior toward you; talk to someone you trust about what is happening; remove yourself from their presence.
You and a friend both apply for a position at the same company. Your friend excitedly tells you that they received an offer. When you tell them that you were denied the position, they ask you how they can be supportive. You suggest having them decline the offer so you guys can apply together somewhere else.
Red Flag.
A healthy friendship invites growth and offers support. It does not involve pressuring others to change or do something they do not want to do.If someone had agreed to do something sexually in the past, they automatically agreed to do the same thing in the future.
False.
Consent can be given or taken at any time. Additionally, consent needs to be given for every act, every time.
What is an unhealthy way of responding to conflict?
Yelling/Screaming; Name Calling; Physically Fighting
Your friend crossed one of your boundaries (i.e., screamed/yelled at you during an argument) and stormed away. The next day, they explain that they had a bad day yesterday and apologize for taking their frustration out on you.
Green Flag.
They took accountability for their actions and apologized.
What if the friend acted like the argument never happened?
Sexual assault cannot happen between two people who are in a relationship.
FALSE.
Name at least three ways to cross boundaries.
Verbal Abuse (insulting, name calling, etc.)
Physical Abuse (Pushing, shoving, hitting, kicking, etc.)
Controlling Behavior (Keeping someone isolated, wanting to know where they are at all times)
Threats (causing fear to make someone comply)
Blame or Shame (Making excuses for their behavior or blaming yourself)
You bring up a concern, and your partner tells you that you are being dramatic, does not take any responsibility, or plays the victim, and twists your story. In more extreme scenarios, they tell you that you are crazy or insane.
Red Flag.
It is okay to give your partner your login information for all of your social media accounts because this is how you show that you're trustworthy.
FALSE.
Password-sharing behaviors can be controlling. True partnership is not based on ownership. Partners don't have the right to know every aspect of their partner's life and they do not have the right to monitor everything the other person does.