The Wrap Sheet
Charge with 15 counts of Breaking and Entering and 1 count of "Heart Enlargement" without a medical license.
The Grinch
Adding a bright Orange or Tangerine to the toe of a Christmas stocking
The United Kingdom (or Turkey)
Deciding to walk home alone in a blizzard without your medication, only to be flattened by a 1,000-pound flying mammal.
Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer
This architectural feature is the standard, yet incredibly narrow, entry point for the "Big Guy" on Christmas Eve.
A Chimney
This classic, thick beverage is often topped with nutmeg; some say it was originally a drink for the British aristocracy because milk and eggs were so expensive.
Eggnog
This moist duo was charged with 1st-degree burglary and harassment after being outsmarted by a 10 yr old.
Harry & Marv (The Wet Bandits)
Hiding a Glass Pickle deep in the branches of the tree; the first child to find it gets an extra gift.
Germany
A mother decides to have a full romantic encounter with a trespasser in red flannel while her child watches from the stairs.
I Saw Mommy KIssing Santa Claus
In the 1994 film The Santa Clause, Scott Calvin’s body magically does this to fit through even the thinnest stovepipes.
It contracts/Shrinks "like a liquid" and get's sucked in.
In the 1994 film The Santa Clause, Scott Calvin requests this specific beverage from Judy the Elf because he’s "lactose intolerant."
Soy Milk
This man was charged with "Workplace Hostility" and "Unpaid Overtime" before being scared straight by three spectral visitors.
Ebenezer Scrooge
Decorating trees with Straw Ornaments, often in the shape of a "Yule Goat" (Julbock).
Sweden
Giving away a vital organ on December 25th to someone who clearly didn't want it, then doing it again the very next year.
Last Christmas
To avoid a smoky disaster, Santa must hope the homeowner has opened this adjustable metal plate inside the chimney.
The Damper
This ancient, spiced ale or cider drink gets its name from an Old English phrase meaning "Be Well" or "Good Health."
Wassail
These two brothers were charged with "Assault and Battery with Snowballs" after attempting to stop Christmas from being too hot or too cold.
The Heat Miser and Snow Miser
Hanging delicate Paper Cranes (Orizuru) on the branches as symbols of peace and longevity.
Japan
A man ignores every "no" and "I must go" from his guest, using the weather as a high-pressure sales tactic to keep her from leaving.
Baby, It's Cold Outside
In 18th-century England, some people actually cleaned their chimneys by dropping this live, flapping farm animal down the flue to "scare" the soot loose.
A Goose
This warm, sugary beverage is the preferred fuel for the children on the train in The Polar Express, served by singing waiters.
Hot Chocolate
This man was charged with "Grand Theft Sleigh" and "Identity Theft" after impersonating Sandy Claws and delivering shrunken heads.
Jack Skellington
Using Spider Webs (or tinsel meant to look like them) based on a folk tale about a widow and a helpful spider.
Ukraine
A group of "carolers" refuses to leave a private residence and threatens to stay until they are forcibly fed a specific fig-based pudding.
We Wish You a Merry Christmas
Before chimneys were the norm, the historical St. Nicholas reportedly squeezed bags of gold through this part of a poor man's house to land in drying stockings.
An Open Window
This drink, which sounds like it’s made of trees, is a classic holiday soda that originated in the 1920s.
Root Beer