famous sayings
this childhood friend of ian's had "yellow glowing eyes" and lives in the woods
dottie
young Ian was often found practicing his dance moves in the kitchen to this song
crazy frog
Ian has a very meticulous strategy for making this go-to breakfast
scrambled eggs
ian hates this psuedo science, but maybe that's just his scorpio side showing
astrology
"I've been lied to!"
hungry? grab a bite to eat at ian's favorite pizza place
sally's
Ian's hair routine and cool shades earned him this nickname
Hollywood
ian rose to the challenge on his 4th birthday when he defeated this villain
darth vader
Following a trip to Siesta Key, Ian wrote a famous essay titled "Worst Vacation Ever" for these reasons.
acceptable answers: red tide, outlets in van didn't work, some other reason i cant remember
ian's f̶a̶v̶o̶r̶i̶t̶e̶ m̶o̶v̶i̶e̶ biopic starred Christian Bale as Ian and was titled this
the dark knight
Ian cannot eat "dinner foods" (no, chips don't count) unless its this time
dinner time
don't eat this kind of sandwich around ian- he might start tweaking
egg salad
dad asked "Ian are you on drugs?" after this event
ian fell asleep and didn't wake up to dad breaking his door down
sweet tooth? try this flavor ice cream- ian's favorite
mint chocolate chip
if ian's food was this, he wouldn't eat any of it
acceptable responses: touching, soggy, etc etc
can't get ian's attention? try throwing this fruit at him
apple
don't get between ian and his food. after a long day of school/work/etc he might say
"this is a sandwich, this is not dinner" also acceptable answers: "where's dinner", "i haven't had a real dinner in three days", etc
ian has a weird obsession with this show
baki
how many forks does ian use for one meal
one but he has to clean it between each food
forced to read "Born A Crime", ian wisely noted that this public figure had a "very punchable face"
trevor noah