Textbook
In the beginning of the chapter, the book describes two types of conflict. What are the two types of conflict?
Productive and unproductive conflict
Explain interdependence
An example of interdependence is even though I choose what job offer to accept, I still talk with my spouse since this decision affects their life too
List at least 3 characteristics of productive conflict
active listening, listening to understand, everyone involved wants to maintain good relationships, calm tones, & all parties engage
List at least 3 characteristics of unproductive conflict
Yelling, name calling, kitchen-sinking, aggressive behaviors, critiquing personality vs. behavior, and many more
What is a boundary?
Boundaries are rules, expectations, needs, and desires that help you feel safe and comfortable in life and in your relationships.
Name two of the four conflict triggers listed in the textbook
Inaccurate assumptions, perceived incompatible goals, relational transgressions, and provocation
What's the term when people bring in old argument topics into the current conflict?
Kitchen-sinking
Give an example of the integrating conflict style
Give an example of when someone is likely to use the obliging conflict style
When they have less power
What can boundaries NOT do?
Cannot control another person's behaviors
What's another way to say indirect fighting?
Passive-aggressive conflict style
Conflict strategy #3 describes the three components you should include when describing what's bothering you. What are those 3 (X-Y-Z) components?
X - behavior
Y - situation
Z - feelings
What are the goals of the dominating/competing style of conflict?
Winning the argument and seeking to meet their goal no matter the cost
According to online lecture, what are the characteristics of the integrating conflict style?
Conflict can be resolved with a win-win and input from everyone involved so we can come to an acceptable resolution
What is an example of a boundary?
"If you continue to shout at me, I'm going to hang up the phone"
Define & Describe the two communication climates listed in the textbook
Defensive - play the blame game, climate when at least one communicator feels threatened
Supportive - open to one another's ideas and climate is neutral vs. blame game
Define emotional flooding and what you should do when it happens
Emotional flooding is when people are so high on their emotions that it impacts their ability to think critically and so you should take a break if you become overwhelmed with emotions to "cool down"
What are the pros & the biggest con of the integrating conflict style?
Pro: Satisfies both parties and empowers others
Con: Time consuming
List the pros and cons of the avoidance conflict style
Pros: allows parties to save face and useful when chances of solving the problem are slim
Cons: can impede relational development & can make problems snowball
History of setting boundaries, personality, culture, power dynamics, & more
Name the 5 factors that impact conflict
Power dynamics, attitudes toward conflict, communication climate, culture and conflict, and communication channel
According to the lecture videos, what four criteria are required to define conflict?
Interdependence, (perceived) incompatible goals, interference & negative emotions
What's the difference between compromise and integrating behaviors during conflict?
Integrating is a solution where everyone gets what they want, compromise is no one gets everything that they want
What's the difference between obliging and avoidance conflict styles?
Avoidance tries to not engage in the conflict all-together, while obliging resolves the conflict easily by giving into what their conflict partner wants
Name 5 of the 7 types of boundaries discussed in-class earlier this week
Time, internal, conversational, physical, emotional, mental, & material