Mindfulness
One of the three how skills
What are one-mindfully, effective, and non-judgmentally (any of these 3 is correct)
What is the priority if you need to get what you are asking for above all else?
What is the objective?
The DEAR MAN skill is used when THIS is the priority?
What is when the most important priority is to achieve our objective (to get the thing we are asking for)?
This is the skill I would rely on if my priority was to maintain the relationship while also trying to get my objective.
What are GIVE skills?
Bonus: name at least one of the GIVE skills.
Name all of the MAN skills in DEAR MAN.
What are (stay) mindful, Appear confident, and Negotiate?
Bonus: At what point in the interaction would you attempt to negotiate?
One of the three what skills
What are observe, describe, participate? (any of these 3 is correct)
You want to ask your roommate to help out more with chores, but you do not want to be so demanding that you lose your roommate as a friend. What might be your priority in this situation?
What is the relationship?
The first step in DEAR MAN is...
What is describe the situation.
Bonus: Please give an example of how you would "describe the situation" if you wanted to ask your friend to pick you up from the airport after a trip.
The I in GIVE stands for... (give an example)
What is (Act) Interested?
Example: Maintain eye contact; nod or use body language to express interest or attention. Ask clarifying questions. Put your phone away. Ignore distractions.
A gentle manner is helpful when using what interpersonal effectiveness skill?
What is GIVE?
This mindfulness skill can help you to acknowledge logical and emotional sides to a decision
What is finding wise mind?
When asking yourself, "How do I want to feel about myself after the interaction is over (whether or not I get the results I want)?" you are considering what priority?
When you come home late without calling, I feel worried about you.
This is an example of what part of DEAR MAN?
What is "E" or express clearly?
FAST is most helpful when you are seeking an objective and also want to maintain THIS?
What is your self-respect?
Being honest without exaggerating or passing judgment is a part of which FAST skill?
What is (Be) truthful?
Eating a chocolate and noticing the sensations without labeling them is an example of this what skill
What is observing?
Note: If you labeled the sensations you would be describing.
True or False: It does not work to always maintain self-respect as your primary goal.
What is true?
Always wanting to have the power or control in a situation, wanting to prove your point can compromise long-term effectiveness. (You may not get what you are actually asking for, even if you "win" the argument.)
When you say no clearly or ask for exactly what you want you are using what letter in DEAR MAN?
What is Assert wishes or "A"?
What is (Be) Fair? Acknowledging your emotions and the other person's is one way of being fair.
When you tell someone that you understand their feelings, wants, difficulties and opinions about the situation, you're using this GIVE skill
What is Validate?
Bonus: Provide one example of how you can validate another person.
Describing a food you dislike as "gross" or "disgusting" is an example of NOT using this HOW skill
What is non-judgmentally?
Which of the three priorities should you consider in any given situation where you want to ask for something or say no to a request?
What are all three priorities?
You want to consider the objective, the relationship, and your self-respect and rank their relative importance to help you determine which skill to use in every situation.
I asked my roommate to pitch in with doing chores every Sunday morning at 9 am for 1 hour. Name an example of how I might Reinforce this.
What is "If we clean the house together once a week it will clear up confusion about when we need to clean, and we will both benefit from starting the week with a clean house."?
...or anything similar where you explain what benefits the other person will get by honoring your request.
The S in FAST stands for....
What is Stick to values?
Bonus: Name an example of a situation where you might have to clarify your values using the S in FAST.
Broken record technique and ignoring attacks are examples of what DEAR MAN skill?
What is (stay) mindful?
Bonus: Explain what broken record means.